Some people think that teenage years are the happiest times of most people's life. Others think that adult life brings more happiness in spite of greater responsibilities. discuss both these views and give your opinion.

most people think that teenagers
the
Add a missing verb
are the
show examples
best
time
of our
life
and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
think that
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
older
give
Verb problem
makes
show examples
our
life
happier. I completely agree
with
Change preposition
that
show examples
youngest
Correct article usage
the youngest
show examples
is the best
time
because it is
time
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
young
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
show examples
to
exploring
Wrong verb form
explore
show examples
their
life
and the responsible less than elder people.
This
essay will discuss both these arguments and the statement of explanation The First with, youngster age is a phase
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
learning about anything. It is the best way to
exploring
Wrong verb form
explore
show examples
anything about hobbies or soft skills without
worries
Wrong verb form
worrying
show examples
to make
Change preposition
about making
show examples
some mistakes.
Moreover
,
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
that moment we have a lot of
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
for
hangout
Correct your spelling
hanging out
show examples
and
killing
Verb problem
spending
show examples
time
together. we
also
feel all over the world support your
life
without
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
know the reality of
life
after
get
Change the verb form
getting
show examples
mature.
However
,
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
this
age
Add a comma
age,
show examples
we
also
tried
Wrong verb form
try
show examples
hard
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
achieve our
dream
Fix the agreement mistake
dreams
show examples
.
For instance
,
opportunity
Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
show examples
to pass
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
great university or try to get a job at
beneficial
Add an article
the beneficial
a beneficial
show examples
company.
on the other hand
, older
life
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
more happiest because we
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
do anything
what
Change the word
that
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
we
show examples
want,
For instance
, you can vacation by yourself after
gain amout
Correct your spelling
gaining a lot
of money or you can decide to take
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
action to solve
problem
Add an article
the problem
a problem
show examples
without worries your parent will intervention you about your decision. Despite,
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
older have big responsibilities about anything around your
life
. in conclusion, I agree that
teenagers
Change noun form
teenagers'
teenager's
show examples
age might be the best for most people because they can explore their
hobies
Correct your spelling
hobbies
or activities
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
love to do without worries about anything.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
adult
also
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
happiness because
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
do anything
what
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they want to with their responsibilities without
look
Wrong verb form
looking
show examples
passed and
continue
Wrong verb form
continuing
show examples
their
life
.
Submitted by fiez97 on

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Introduction
Your introduction does not clearly present the topic or outline the structure of the essay. It is essential to have a strong introductory paragraph that introduces the topic, presents both views, and states your opinion clearly. Aim to have a concise overview structured in a formal and academic tone.
Logical Structure
The logical structure of your essay could be improved significantly. Your essay should be organized into clear paragraphs, each with a single main idea supported by relevant details. The transition between ideas should be smooth, making it easier for the reader to follow your line of reasoning.
Conclusion
The conclusion should summarize the key points discussed in the essay and reiterate your stance clearly. Ensure that it wraps up the argument effectively without introducing new ideas.
Specific Examples
Use specific examples to support your points. While you have attempted to provide examples, they need to be more detailed and directly related to the point being made. Refrain from making general statements without backing them up with specific evidence.
Complete Response
You have touched upon the task but the response could be more complete. Make sure your essay answers all parts of the prompt, maintaining a balanced approach by discussing both views sufficiently before giving your opinion.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
Your ideas need to be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Work on articulating your points in a way that is precise and easy to understand. Avoid overly general or vague statements, and instead, focus on clarity of expression.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Adolescence
  • Vibrancy
  • Self-discovery
  • Maturation
  • Fulfillment
  • Life milestones
  • Peer pressure
  • Personal autonomy
  • Financial independence
  • Emotional intelligence
  • Nostalgia
  • Adulting
  • Quarter-life crisis
  • Midlife achievement
  • Existential satisfaction
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