the table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of britain the table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed

the table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of britain the table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed
The table and pie charts give data about police fund and their expenses in a Particular region in Britain between 2017 and 2018.
overall
, the police budget was over 300 million in both years and the main money was provided by
National
Correct article usage
the National
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government which increased from 175.5 million to 177 in the recorded period.
On the other hand
, local taxes were approximately per three of
whole
Change the article
the whole
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fund
also
it increased
about
Change preposition
by about
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10 million pounds in
mentioned
Correct article usage
the mentioned
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years. As can seen in
charts
Correct article usage
the charts
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police
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
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included three segments.
employee's
Change noun form
employee
show examples
salaries have the majority of expenses
while
technology had the lowest proportion,
however
, it raised slightly in 2018 in Comparison with 2017, another part of costs" was buildings and transport which didn't change from 2017 to 2018.
Submitted by zahrahosseini1992 on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • budget allocation
  • funding sources
  • government policies
  • economic conditions
  • community services
  • crime prevention
  • public safety
  • significant increase/decrease
  • distribution
  • assessment
  • reflection
  • allocation shifts
  • budget comparison
  • impact analysis
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