IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The Internet should be made free for everyone. Do you argree or disagree

#internet #argree
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In today’s civilization, the
Internet
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 has become an essential part of our lives, but undeniably it is still costly for some
people
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 to have
access
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 to it.
This
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 is particularly true for
people
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 with
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
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 income range. I strongly believe that the
Internet
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 should be free for
everyone
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.
Although
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 free
Internet
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 might bring harm to more
people
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 by allowing exposure to negative
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
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, free
Internet
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 leads to equality of
access
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world
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to world
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knowledge
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 and
improved
Correct article usage
an improved
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economy
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.
This
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 essay
further
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 elaborates to provide
explanation
Correct article usage
an explanation
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 and support my point of view. The first main reason why the
Internet
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 should be made free for
everyone
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 is equality to
access
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 world
knowledge
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 which is needed for all
individuals
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 as it can lead to
people
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’s
access
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 to a broad range of information to strengthen their education. It is believed that
inequal
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unequal
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access
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 to global
knowledge
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 is one of the most vital issues in third-world countries. Research shows that “having
Internet
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access
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 has generally become necessary for students to have adequate opportunities to learn. Students in households without
Internet
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access
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 are unjustly disadvantaged in obtaining a good school education” (Reglitz, 2023). Considering the findings, it is evident that with the
Internet
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,
people
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 would have a better chance to develop their wisdom.
Thus
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, paying for the
Internet
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 is not beneficial because it does not give
individuals
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access
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 to worldwide
knowledge
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 equally.
Furthermore
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, free
access
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 to the digital world helps stimulate the
economy
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. It is common
knowledge
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 that the worldwide web is a tool that allows
individuals
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 to find more jobs and build their own businesses easily in the era of worldwide connectivity. Because of
this
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, countries with a population that can
access
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 the
Internet
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 can substantially boost their
economy
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.
According to
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 research by Deloitte (2014), “In developing economies shows that a 10% increase in broadband penetration increases per
capital
Correct your spelling
capita
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 GDP growth by 1.3%. On
this
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 basis, personal income levels could see a massive increase” In that sense, it allows
people
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 to spend more money which naturally leads to consumption growth and
catalyze
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catalyzes
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 economic development.
Thus
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, free
Internet
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 should be available for
individuals
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 because of its positive effects on
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economy
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the economy
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. Some
people
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 might argue that there are negative consequences of making the
Internet
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 free as it would allow more
people
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 to come across violent and misleading information ranging from fake news, explicit content, and violent images. On
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this
Correct determiner usage
the
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 surface,
this
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 seems to be true.
Nevertheless
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, there are strong efforts by both the public and private sectors to mitigate
access
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 to harmful content. Streel et al. (2020) claim that “to share responsibility for a safe
Internet
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 between all the private actors involved and a good cooperation with public authorities,
thus
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, injured parties should notify online platforms on any illegality they found and should block
access
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 to illegal content” In light of
this
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 evidence, cooperation between the public and private sectors would make it much more difficult for
people
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 to have
access
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 to harmful content. These elaborations show
although
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 the
Internet
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 can be harmful, there are ways to get around these problems. In conclusion, the
Internet
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 should be free for
everyone
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 because it will encourage all
individuals
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 to
access
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 information equally, and it will boost the global
economy
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. It is generally believed that free
Internet
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 can have
more
Add an article
a more
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 positive impact because it can lead
people
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 who are low-income and in underdeveloped countries to
access
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 worldwide
knowledge
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 and provide them with more job opportunities.
Therefore
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, it will bring significant benefits if the
Internet
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 is made accessible
for
Change preposition
to
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everyone
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.
Submitted by gammxoxo on

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coherence cohesion
Consider utilizing a wider range of cohesive devices and synonyms to showcase lexical resource and avoid repetition. Work on varying sentence structures to create a more intricate argument.
task achievement
Although the essay has addressed the task with some relevant points, there's a need for a deeper exploration of counterarguments to fully satisfy the requirements of a balanced argument. Ensure that your ideas are not repetitive and that each paragraph introduces a new point.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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