IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

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Nowadays, public transport can represent a relevant element in urban logistics strategies. The purpose of
this
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 essay is to present the pros and cons of these
transportation
Use synonyms
 solutions, mainly associated with their practicality and their costs, respectively. On the one hand, one significant advantage of state-owned
transportation
Use synonyms
systems
Use synonyms
that
Add a missing verb
is that
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 they
accessible
Add a missing verb
are accessible
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 and practical for citizens.
This
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 is because their fares are usually cheap, allowing an affordable way of locomotion for low-income commuters.
Additionally
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, in big cities, they connect distinct means of commuting
systems
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 available, providing faster and easier travel throughout neighbourhoods, in many cases, in a safe and comfortable way.
For instance
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, Tokyo's public
transportation
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 network, which includes railways, buses and subways, interconnects distant points across
this
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 metropolis, with a fare lower than five American dollars for each travel.
On the other hand
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, public commuting
systems
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 require a cost and time-demanding implementation, which is supported by local governments, which is a disadvantage to be considered. Since governmental funding is mandatory for their construction, and
due to
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 several interventions required to implant a public
transportation
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 system,
such
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 as
railways
Change the noun form
railway
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 assembly or traffic detours, these developments are normally pricey.
Furthermore
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, the resources destined for these kinds of projects could be invested in other pressing issues, like education development and lack of housing. To mention, Rio de Janeiro's westbound subway has taken more than ten years to be concluded, and its final cost was four times higher than its initial figure.
To sum up
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, public commuting
systems
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 are vital in urban areas, and, despite their drawbacks related to their implementation, their benefits are significant to the population, especially because its affordability and practicality.

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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction directly addresses the essay topic and provides a clear thesis statement outlining what the essay will discuss. A more explicit focus on the initial question can help improve task achievement.
task achievement
Make sure to provide a balanced view in your conclusion, summarizing both the pros and cons you've presented, and directly respond to the question with your own viewpoint to satisfy the task requirements fully.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance coherence by using a variety of linking words and phrases to clearly show the connections between ideas. Transition smoothly from general statements to specific examples.
coherence and cohesion
Include a concluding sentence for each body paragraph to encapsulate the main point discussed, thereby improving the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Refer back to the question throughout your essay to ensure relevance and maintain a consistent argument in line with the task objectives.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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