The rise of social media has affected personal relationships and society as a whole. Do the advantages of using social media for communication outweigh the disadvantages?

In the modern day, technology has developed rapidly, especially social
media
, and it has affected society and its
relationships
. Using social
media
brings more benefits for communication than disadvantages when it comes to human
life
. Technology has developed dramatically day by day so communication between
humans
to
humans
also
increased. Social
media
was invented to help
humans
find easier or more methods to keep in touch with others.
For instance
, social
media
can grow human network
relationships
. What's more convenient,
humans
can keep track of their family or friends to update their information about
people
around their lives. Increasing network
relationships
will bring more benefits for
humans
in reality, accidentally,
humans
can gain opportunities to increase
life
quality by social
media
. Social
media
may help you in many fields of your study or work by sharing pieces of information
Change preposition
apply
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about
Change preposition
apply
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daily. Many
people
will share some tips or methods to help other
people
when they have a problem. Using social can help them update information about
life
without searching, especially, for
people
who aren’t fond of communicating
face
to
face
with other
people
or
people
who struggle with
life
and have some special condition.
Although
the prop is useful and convenient social
media
brings for human
life
. Spending almost all of the time just suffering on social
media
may cause a risk problem for
humans
like their communication or charisma skill will dramatically low and
humans
can lose their
relationships
. More than that, they can easily get depression than other
people
due to
they don’t have the experience to avoid the toxicity in social
media
or even in real
life
.
To conclude
, social
media
brings many advantages to human
life
, human can get more opportunities to develop their
life
, character or even
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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.
But
Correct word choice
However
show examples
social
media
can cause a problem when communicating with other
people
when
meet
Change the verb form
meeting
show examples
face
to
face
.
Submitted by zky1705202 on

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task achievement
The essay addresses the topic but could be improved by fully developing all parts of the prompt. Be sure to clearly state if the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and support this statement throughout.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas more effectively by creating distinct paragraphs for each main point. Use a range of cohesive devices and transition words to connect ideas clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • global connectivity
  • networking opportunities
  • real-time information
  • community building
  • marketing opportunities
  • self-expression
  • educational content
  • privacy concerns
  • data security
  • misinformation
  • fake news
  • cyberbullying
  • interpersonal skills
  • distraction
  • productivity
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