Food travels thousands of miles from farmers to consumers. Some people think that it would be better for our environment and economy if people consumed locally produced foods. To what extent do the advantages of this would outweigh the disadvantages?
The fact that food is an inseparable part of our
life
is obvious to all. In the contemporary era, Fix the agreement mistake
lives
large
amount of time and energy must be considered to transport Add an article
a large
the large
foods
from farmland to customers. It is thought that one of the best ways to tackle this
problem is that
people Correct word choice
for
consume
Fix the infinitive
to consume
foods
produced by local farmers
which is good for both economy
and Correct article usage
the economy
environment
. In my perspective, it is not a good idea.
On the one hand, purchasing locally made products are much cheaper than other materials. To clarify, there is no need to dedicate Correct article usage
the environment
additional
budget Correct article usage
an additional
on
Change preposition
to
transportation
of these goods resulting in dwindling the total price. Correct article usage
the transportation
For instance
, in my vicinity, dairy products like milk and yogurt
are really affordable compared to those coming from tens of miles away.
Change the spelling
yoghurt
On the other hand
, it is not possible for farmers
to cultivate all sorts of foods
. This
is because each seed needs its especial
situation to be grown up and no one dares to deny the importance of suitable water, farmable soil and enough sunlight for Correct your spelling
special
this
purpose but they vary for various plants. Moreover
, so seriously has posing
a threat to the economic condition of some Change the verb form
posed
farmers
, who selling
their products to buyers far from their lands Change the form of the verb
sell
is
the only source of income, affected many Correct your spelling
as
peoples
point of attitude that they strongly believe that procuring food solely from the local is not a wise opinion. Fix the agreement mistake
people
Hence
, this
suggestion is not profitable.
In conclusion, although
it is economical to purchase locally produced foods
, underestimating this
fact that all fruits and vegetables cannot be cultivated in all lands Correct determiner usage
the
in addition
to putting some farmers
in a
monetary trouble is not logical. Remove the article
apply
Therefore
, in my viewpoint, the cons outweigh the pros. 291 words / 57 minSubmitted by sarmastsobhan1994 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
The essay could benefit from a more structured approach, with a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages before reaching a conclusion. It is crucial that the introduction clearly addresses the essay prompt and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, reflecting the overall opinion.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay requires improvement. It is necessary to have a clear progression of ideas with appropriate paragraphing. Each paragraph should explore a single main idea with supporting details. Transition words should be used to create cohesion between sentences and paragraphs.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.