Parents and teachers make many rules for children to increase good behaviour and protect them from danger. However, children wood benefit from fever rules and greater freedom. To what extent do. You agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that for the
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being
show examples
as well as
Linking Words
protection of the
children
Use synonyms
theit
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
and teachers make many rules and regulations but
children
Use synonyms
take advantage
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
these rules and do those activities which have detrimental effects on their
future
Use synonyms
. I
am completely agree
Change the verb form
completely agree
show examples
with
notion
Add an article
the notion
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will discuss my point of view which leads to
logical
Add an article
a logical
show examples
solution. To Commence with, for being responsible
parents
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
mentors, they made some kind of rules for pupils like
parents
Use synonyms
gave the authority to their kids to do the job
according to
Linking Words
their interests because they want their
children
Use synonyms
become
Fix the infinitive
to become
show examples
independent but some kids do not have
keen
Add an article
a keen
show examples
interest in doing any work so they choose those jobs which are useless and are not beneficial for their
future
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, some youngsters follow
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
celebrities and tend to become like them but without thinking about the negative repercussions they
wastes
Change the verb form
waste
show examples
a large amount of money.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the mentors provide the responsibility to the
students
Use synonyms
who are extraordinary but those
students
Use synonyms
took advantage of
this
Linking Words
and
pesters
Verb problem
passed it
show examples
to the other
students
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, In a
class
Add a comma
class,
show examples
a tutor
gave
Wrong verb form
gives
show examples
the opportunity of monitoring the class to a student but the student starts punish to the whole class
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
the motive of
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
some fun which
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
impact on the studies
as well as
Linking Words
Use synonyms
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
of other
students
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
parents
Use synonyms
and tutors give the pupils a responsibility in order to make their
future
Use synonyms
bright,
Children
Use synonyms
take advantage of
this
Linking Words
freedom and take
wrong
Change the article
the wrong
show examples
step
Fix the agreement mistake
steps
show examples
which
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
detrimental consequences.
Submitted by sunnygarg710 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Make sure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction should present the topic and your thesis statement, the body paragraphs should each focus on a single main idea with explanations and examples, and the conclusion should summarize your points and restate your position.
logical sequence
Improve your essay's logical structure by organizing your ideas more clearly. Each paragraph should address a single point, and the ideas should be arranged logically so that one leads to the next in a coherent way.
examples
Support your main points with specific examples. Each argument you present should be backed up by concrete examples. This makes your arguments stronger and more convincing.
grammar
Revise the essay for grammatical accuracy and to address any sentence fragments or run-on sentences. Consider simplicity and clarity over complexity in sentence construction.
sentence variety
Vary your sentence structure to include both simple and complex sentences. This will help your writing feel more natural and engaging.
transitions
Enhance cohesion by using transitional words and phrases to link ideas within and between paragraphs. This guides the reader through your essay in a smooth and logical manner.
relevance
Stay focused on the topic. Ensure that each sentence and example is directly related to the main idea of the essay prompt and your stance on it.
conclusion
Refrain from introducing new arguments in the conclusion. The conclusion should only summarize what has already been discussed in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Boundaries
  • Stifle
  • Decision-making
  • Relevant
  • Evolve
  • Mistakes
  • Balanced approach
  • Rebellion
  • Deceitful
  • Responsibility
  • Self-regulation
  • Exposure
  • Risks
  • Guidance
  • Appropriate limits
What to do next:
Look at other essays: