While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree? You should write **at least 250 words.**
Many
people
think that academic study is really important, while
some think due to
lack
of workers Correct article usage
the lack
so
Correct word choice
apply
people
should encouraged to do vocational training to work as electricians and plumbers. In my opinion, i
do not agree with Change the capitalization
I
this
statement.
On the other hand
, many people
considered
that academic education Wrong verb form
consider
is
a great role Verb problem
plays
for
life because it can get Change preposition
in
prominent
job in the future. Looking from the Add an article
a prominent
overall
perspective, a large amount of people
who successful
in their Add a missing verb
are successful
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
a
excellent Change the article
an
education
background. Replace the word
educational
Moreover
, many students have graduated from the University, it has been a
challenging to get a better job. Change the article
apply
However
, some people
might not be able to go for higher education because of their financial problems. But there are many vocational training that can get qualified certifications, for instance
, some people
couldn’t study engineer
degree Replace the word
engineering
due to
some reasons but they have a chance to become as
Change preposition
apply
a electricians
.
Correct the article-noun agreement
an electrician
electricians
On the other hand
, there are thousands of people
working at a higher position though they did not graduate from University. They studied from
online and training Change preposition
apply
class
and they got experiences from it. Fix the agreement mistake
classes
According to
my believe
, Replace the word
belief
people
should go to university if possible whereas
they can take some kind of training class. There are dozen
of Fix the agreement mistake
dozens
people
in the world, it
should not be encouraged to do vocational training as a purpose of qualified workers.
Correct pronoun usage
who
To conclude
, people
should decide what they are passionate about, and they can pursue many courses from training and became
a Wrong verb form
become
professionalism
in the future.Replace the word
professional
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task response
Ensure your introduction clearly states your position on the prompt. In this case, your disagreement with the statement should be directly mentioned along with an outline of your main points.
task response
Develop your paragraphs with clear topic sentences that reflect the specific points you're making. Each main point should ideally be elaborated on with explanations or examples to deepen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Work on creating a clear logical structure to your essay by arranging your paragraphs in a way that each one builds upon the previous point. Transitional phrases can help to guide the reader through your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Include a conclusion that summarises your key points and restates your position unequivocally. Try to ensure that it closes off the discussion effectively rather than introducing new ideas or leaving questions unanswered.
coherence and cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (linking words) correctly to help link ideas within and across paragraphs. Overusing certain phrases can make the text feel repetitive, so strive for variety.
task response
Introduce specific, detailed examples to support your main points. These examples should be relevant to the topic and should help to illustrate your arguments more clearly.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example