The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this outweight the disadvantages?

#information #individuals #internet #companies #organisations #outweight

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It has been a growing argument

that

Change preposition

about

show examples

whether or not large

internet

companies

or organisations should store personal

information

While

there are certain benefits, the disadvantages definitely exceed the advantages. I will present my arguments in

this

essay. In order to use the services provided by large

internet

companies

, users often need to provide personal

information

such

as name, IP address, and age. Large

internet

companies

such

as Google or Facebook, are of course highly trusted for their technology and facilities, allowing them to store and secure users’ personal

information

. Those

companies

spend millions of dollars every year in advancing their

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

and facilities, compared to regular people could just spend thousands of dollars on their

smart phone

Correct your spelling

smartphones

show examples

labtop

Correct your spelling

laptops

However

, with complete access to those personal

information

, those

internet

companies

or organisations

also

profit dramatically by selling those personal

information

. It has become a common practice that advertising

companies

buy personal

information based

Add a hyphen

information-based

show examples

profiles or tags from large

internet

companies

in order to create a more successful

advertisment compaign

Correct your spelling

advertising campaign

For example

, Google creates personal

infromation based

Correct your spelling

information-based

profiles and tags and

sell

Correct subject-verb agreement

sells

show examples

them to

advertiseoment

Correct your spelling

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

274 words

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The personal information of many individuals is held by large internet companies and organisations. Do you think the advantages of this outweight the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Beside a lot of advantages, some people believe that the Internet creates many problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Government Intervention in the Economy: Some people believe that governments should regulate the economy, while others argue that the economy should be allowed to regulate itself. Discuss both views and give your opinion in 250 words.

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do you think that the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the modern world, many employees lack soft skill such as communication and working in the teams. What are the main causes of this problem? What are the effects of the lack of such skills ?