The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing, Do you agree or disagree?

#growth #shops #towns #cities

Nowadays, myriad

people

tend to buy their needs by ordering online.

Hence

, some

people

argue that

this

will lead all the shops in towns to closure. I think closing all the

stores

, because of the development of online purchasing is not realistic. In today's fast-paced world,

time

plays a crucial role in individuals' lives.

Consequently

, more

people

are joining the online shopping club daily. In fact, online buying prevents us from

time-consuming

Add a missing verb

being time-consuming

show examples

both by spending less

time

stores

and commuting.

For instance

although

we should spend more than 2 hours buying groceries in person, we are able to decrease

this

time

to just 20 minutes by placing our orders online.

Moreover

, online purchasing allows us to compare prices and shop with better wisdom.

On the other hand

, the shopping is considered as an important leisure

time

activity. Indeed, many

people

, women

in particular

, do not merely go to the

stores

to buy stuff but

also

assume in-store shopping is their favourite pastime.

Furthermore

, there are many folks who like to check the quality of goods and try on garments before ordering them. Needless to say,

this

attitude has resulted in the development of huge shopping malls all over the world. In conclusion, I believe online shopping is an undeniable step for

time

-saving and

this

makes it more favourable for more

people

however

, shopping itself is a fundamental activity for myriad

people

Hence

, closing all the

stores

because of the evolution of online buying is not considerable.

Submitted by ali on Sat Jan 20 2024

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task achievement

Your essay presents a view that is relevant to the task, but it should further elaborate on specific reasons why physical shops are unlikely to close. Consider developing more detailed examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, but to enhance coherence, try to make smoother transitions between your paragraphs and ideas. This can be achieved through more varied linking words and clearer topic sentences.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

247 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

e-commerce
brick-and-mortar
physical stores
online retailers
retail apocalypse
digital economy
consumer behavior
sustainability
commercial landscape
high-street
consumer trends
augmented reality
showrooms
carbon footprint

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The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing, Do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

Technological devices are very popular nowadays. Students should be allowed to use mobile phones

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achive anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this messages?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?