It is important for the people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Risk is a fickle topic to discuss. Often the concept is portrayed as reckless and brash, despite there being clear benefits to executing
less than secure
plans in both work and home Add a hyphen
less-than-secure
life
. In this
essay
I will outline the advantages and disadvantages of taking risks in one's Add a comma
essay,
life
.
To start with, let's analyze the benefits. In your professional life
, taking chances with a high-reward, large-loss
business offer can lead to a large financial profit, Add an article
the large-loss
a large-loss
as well as
opening more paths for future endeavors
. In personal Change the spelling
endeavours
life
, exercising risk can train your brain to be a bit more courageous, far braver than if you were to live a safe life
. This
can allow for more fulfilling experiences to be had that you otherwise
might not have considered, broadening your horizons. Even if you make mistakes, it's something for you to learn from, helping you to be a little more analytical.
On the other hand
, bad work ventures can lead to a significant loss in revenue, very well holding the possibility of bankrupting you and sending your world into a less than great
state to be in. Taking too many dicey offers might Add a hyphen
less-than-great
also
run you down the possibility of finding yourself knee-deep in shady back alley deals with less than trustworthy
types. These multiple outcomes will Add a hyphen
less-than-trustworthy
also
stress your brain quite a lot, resulting in mental conditions such
as depression, anxiety, and PTSD.
To conclude
, risks are equally sided with both positive and negative impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
,
as if Remove the comma
apply
it
were two sides of an everyday coin. Correct pronoun usage
they
But
I believe that with enough good judgement and analysis, living a risky career can benefit a person in their personal growth and financial situation.Correct word choice
However
Submitted by lydiaia on
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task achievement
Although the essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages of risk-taking, the evaluation could be more balanced. Consider providing specific examples to illustrate advantages and to quantify the potential rewards of taking risks.
task achievement
The essay presents clear main points but lacks specific examples to support arguments. Include more detailed scenarios or evidence that shows how risk-taking can lead to personal growth or financial improvement.
coherence and cohesion
While the introduction and conclusion are present, there is room for a stronger thesis statement and a more rounded conclusion that doesn't introduce new ideas but rather summarizes the ones you've already presented.
coherence and cohesion
To enhance the logical flow, use transitional phrases and connectors to guide the reader through your argument. Additionally, ensure each paragraph is clearly focused on a single main idea.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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