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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The bar chart below shows the number of students who chose certain university subjects in 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and making comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the number of students who chose certain university subjects in 2005. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and making comparisons where relevant.
#bar #students #university #subjects #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar chart in 2005 shows the
number
Use synonyms
 of students who chose certain university
subjects
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. The
Use synonyms
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
 are different in every subject between
males
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 and
females
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 bar chart the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
males
Use synonyms
just
Add a missing verb
is just
show examples
 over 20
thousand
Use synonyms
 in
science
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
 but the lowest
number
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 of just under 5
thousand
Use synonyms
 in
languages
Fix the agreement mistake
language
show examples
subjects
Use synonyms
. On the other side, the highest
number
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 of
females
Use synonyms
just
Add a missing verb
is just
show examples
 under 25
thousand
Use synonyms
 in the Social
Science
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
 the lowest
number
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 of just over 1
thousand
Use synonyms
 in Mathematics
subjects
Use synonyms
. The statistics of
bar
Correct article usage
the bar
show examples
 chart
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
males
Use synonyms
 did
best
Rephrase
better
show examples
 and achieved
good
Correct word choice
better
show examples
 numbers in five
subjects
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;
Science
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, Mathematics, Humanities, literature and law than
females
Use synonyms
 in 2005. So,
females
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 did
best
Replace the word
better
show examples
 than
males
Use synonyms
 in three
subjects
Use synonyms
; Social
Science
Use synonyms
, languages and Arts.
Submitted by hassanrasuli52 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 89%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, subjects, males, females, thousand, science with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just over" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just under" was used 2 times.
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