Nowadays, more and more people choose to do their shopping onlineinstead of going to physical stores. Why is this so? What are the disadvantages of this trend?
Online shopping has gained popularity among
people
in recent years compared to the past. Numerous shopping applications, which provide delivery services would be accepted the
significant reason why Change preposition
as the
people
prefer to buy their groceries online. However
, this
preferance
may lead to an increase in Correct your spelling
preference
unemployment
rates in the business.
Nowadays, thanks to the comprehensive and well-designed web pages, shoppers may buy their needs, while
sitting on their coach
Correct your spelling
couch
at
their living room, Change preposition
in
instead
of going to a store
. Therefore
, they can save their time,
and may engage in refreshing activities, like reading or doing yoga. Remove the comma
apply
In addition
, they may be more overjoyed as they escape from mundane tasks such
as selecting tomatoes, or waiting in a line for payment. Furthermore
, online stores
are likely to offer more discounts to their customers, due to
the fact that they do not pay for renting
a huge Wrong verb form
rent
store
, or electiricty
like physical Correct your spelling
electricity
stores
. Since, they pay only for a
moderate storage, their outcomes, which Remove the article
apply
origin
from Replace the word
originate
workers
Change noun form
workers'
worker's
salary
, or electricity are lower in comparison with the traditional Fix the agreement mistake
salaries
stores
. Hence
, they may offer better discount opportunities for buyers. In this
way, shopper
may save Add an article
the shopper
a shopper
their
money Correct pronoun usage
apply
via
purchasing their needs online.
The major drawback related to Change preposition
by
this
pattern is the likelihood of rising unemployment
rates in the
society. The more Correct article usage
apply
people
prefer to buy online, the more conventional stores
face to risk of bankruptcy. As a result
, individuals, who work as a cashier, a cleaning stuff
, or a manager of a supermarket are likely to face Correct your spelling
staff
to
the risk of Change preposition
apply
unemployment
. Companies tend to change their stores
towards online types, in this
way they are able to supply their customer's demand with lower
number of workers. Add an article
a lower
the lower
For example
, an online store
may make the same profit, with only two delivery guys, with
a physical Change preposition
as
store
, where ten people
are employed. Unfortunately, factories are likely to fire their employees, in order to make more profit. Unevitably
, Correct your spelling
Inevitably
this
phenomenon results in rising unemployment
rates in the society
To conclude
, when all these factories
are taken into accountCorrect your spelling
factors
,
since online shopping Remove the comma
apply
provide
to save money and time in terms of shoppers, Change the verb form
provides
people
eager
to use Add a missing verb
are eager
this
alternative, instead
of going to a supermarket on foot. However
, this
trend may result in an increase in the number of jobless people
in the long run. Authorities, should be aware of this
risk, and implement laws for saving
their citizens from being fired.Change preposition
to save
Submitted by ilaydailday on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure of your essay, make sure to organize your paragraphs clearly with distinct introductions, development of ideas, and conclusions. Also, use cohesive devices appropriately to connect ideas smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction and conclusion are clearly defined and reflect the content of your essay. The introduction should set the stage for your argument and the conclusion should effectively summarize your main points without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
While you have supported your main points, consider strengthening your argument with more detailed examples and data. This could involve citing studies, surveys, or other forms of empirical evidence to back up your arguments.
task achievement
You've provided a complete response to the task, addressing both aspects of the question (why people shop online and the disadvantages). To score higher, work on developing your ideas more fully and providing a more in-depth analysis of the issues.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear, but to improve comprehensiveness, expand on each point with more details and explanations. Each paragraph should fully explore the point being made.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. The examples provided are somewhat generic, so adding real-world cases or specific scenarios would make your essay stronger.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...