* The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

* The chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The chart illustrates information regarding the individual's
coffee
Use synonyms
and
tea
Use synonyms
consumption in five diverse cities in Australia.
According to
Linking Words
the given data,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
coffee
Use synonyms
and
tea
Use synonyms
usage in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cafe
Fix the agreement mistake
cafes
show examples
is more popular among the five cities and the highest amount of
this
Linking Words
consumption belongs to Melbourne, Hobart, Sydney, Brisbane and Adelaide respectively (about 63%, 62%, 61%, 56%, and 49%).
However
Linking Words
, the popularity of drinking
coffee
Use synonyms
and
tea
Use synonyms
in cafes is in close competition
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
instant
coffee
Use synonyms
in Adelaide. In the end, there is less popularity related to buying fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
these locations.
The fresh
Correct article usage
Fresh
show examples
coffee
Use synonyms
has the
high
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
consumption among these cities respectively (Sydney about 44%, Melbourne about 42%, Horbat about 38%, Adelaide about 35%, and Brisbane about 34%).
To sum up
Linking Words
, the
coffee
Use synonyms
and
tea
Use synonyms
are used in the three various ways among the Australians. The former the usage of
coffee
Use synonyms
in cafes has the most popularity and the latter the instant
coffee
Use synonyms
. The lowest demand
finally
Linking Words
belongs to fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by MinaDadashi1376 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, tea with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 6 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • survey
  • coffee
  • tea
  • buying habits
  • drinking habits
  • Australian cities
  • consumption
  • respondents
  • regular
  • participants
  • levels
  • observed
  • popular
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