Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

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Nowadays,
Young
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the Young
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generation
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become influenced by their same age
group
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behaviours so it
increase
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increases
show examples
peer
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pressure
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to
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on
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them. Some
people
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argue that
peer
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pressure
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is a matter to them
while
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some
people
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disagree
that
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with that
show examples
statement. The topic will
discuss
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be discussed
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with both
point
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points
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of view with relevant facts.
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Due to many
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Many
show examples
young
generation
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are
materialist
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materialists
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that is
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the reason why they become very competitive
each
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with each
show examples
other.
Young
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The young
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generation
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are very attracted to
use
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using
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latest
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the latest
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devices they
illure
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ensure
that it
make
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makes
show examples
them more rich and popular among their
friends
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. For
instant
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an instant
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, one of their
friend
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friends
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wear
fashionable
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a fashionable
the fashionable
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dress, the other
also
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would like to dress up the same way and
unfortunately
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unfortunately,
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they feel
jeoulsy
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jealousy
that they got
peer
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pressure
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from it.
However
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, most of
young
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the young
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people
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are very good at observation and they have
a brilliant innovative ideas
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brilliant innovative ideas
a brilliant innovative idea
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. When
analyze
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analysing
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the data of popularity in social media, half of the
people
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are young
generation
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. At a
conseqence
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consequence
, other young
people
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can get motivation from them and they will gain their confidence and
knowledege
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knowledge
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many
people
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change their
manner
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manners
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and
habbit
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habits
due to
Linking Words
their environment.
This
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is why young
people
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can easily influenced by their
friends
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or
friends
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group
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. They would like to test everything surrounding them, like smoking, drinking and using drugs. If
the
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apply
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one person is using
drug
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drugs
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in their
group
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, the other person would like to know.
Although
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it has disadvantages, some
people
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may change bad
habbits
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habits
to good
habbits
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habits
because of their
same
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apply
show examples
age
group
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. They are more
enthuasiam
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enthusiasm
to study harder like their
friends
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, they may be more interested in
athletis
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athletics
athletes
and become more
knoweledgable
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knowledgeable
knowledgable
. It
give
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gives
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them
a
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apply
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pressure
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but it would be a great benefit for them. To
be conclude
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conclude
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, young
people
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can easily
influenced
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influence
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by their
surroundings
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surrounding's
surroundings'
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behaviors
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behaviours
show examples
that lead to
peer
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pressure
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for them but it is hard to say only advantages or disadvantages by looking from different perspectives.
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coherence cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, consider organizing your essay more clearly with distinct paragraphs that include an introduction, body paragraphs, each with a central idea, and a conclusion. Ensure your paragraphs are logically connected, and use a range of cohesive devices appropriately, such as linking words and phrases.
task achievement
For task achievement, ensure you are directly addressing the question prompt by discussing whether the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages. Provide a balanced argument with clear examples supporting both sides, and make sure to give a clear conclusion reflecting your own opinion on the matter.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • influence
  • behavior
  • age group
  • peer pressure
  • distinct
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • motivate
  • excel
  • positive behaviors
  • substance abuse
  • bullying
  • risky activities
  • belonging
  • acceptance
  • anxiety
  • stress
  • low self-esteem
  • conform
  • individuality
  • personal growth
  • decision-making skills
  • situations
  • resist
  • healthy balance
  • personal development
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