IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The maps below show the center of a small town called Lslip as it is now, and plans for its development.

The maps below show the center of a small town called Lslip as it is now, and plans for its development.
#maps #show #center #town #lslip #plans #development
The map demonstrates expected renovations in a Lslip.
Overall
, the most noticeable
changing
Replace the word
change
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 is the fact that
dual
Correct article usage
a dual
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 carriageway, that
circle
Correct subject-verb agreement
circles
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 around
city
Add an article
the city
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, is planned to be created.
Also
, two more housing is going to
be build
Change the verb form
be built
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. It is noticeable that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 some facilities remained unchanged or with small
difference
Fix the agreement mistake
differences
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. First of all,
school
Correct article usage
the school
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 is planned to stay at the same location.
Also
,
Correct article usage
the park
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park
Fix the agreement mistake
parks
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 and two housings would not be relocated,
however
Add a comma
however,
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 some partition of
parks
Correct article usage
the parks
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 territory is going to be executed for building
a
Remove the article
apply
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new housing.
Main
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The main
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 road is planned to be replaced by
Correct article usage
a pedestrians'
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pedestrians'
Change noun form
pedestrians
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 friendly area. Nowadays, two shop rows
located
Add a missing verb
are located
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 on both sides of a main road.
However
north
Correct article usage
the north
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 side of
a
Correct article usage
the
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 city is expected to be reconstructed and
a
Remove the article
apply
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totally new infrastructure is going to be created. In a map of
Lslip
Correct article usage
the Lslip
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center
Change the spelling
centre
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 development is seen that
bus
Correct article usage
a bus
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 station, shopping
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 and car park would be built.
Submitted by dyussenovaanel on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, however".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • town center
  • landmark
  • residential area
  • commercial district
  • infrastructure
  • urban planning
  • development proposal
  • rejuvenation
  • green space
  • sustainability
  • traffic congestion
  • property values
  • pedestrian
  • preservation
  • modernization
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