Some people think that it would be better for large companies and industries to move to regional areas outside large urban centers. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, many corporations expand their business to remote
areas
. Many people hold the view that relocating concerns to rural
areas
has potential benefits
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
economic growth and equitable development,
while
others hold a different perspective.
This
essay will explore how the benefits of
this
issue outweigh the drawbacks.
To begin
with, it is crucial to prioritize sustainable development in the countryside to decrease inequalities in the economy and society. To illustrate
this
, people often move from rural to urban
areas
due to
limited jobs and infrastructure, causing overpopulation.
Therefore
, having big commerce in regional
areas
results in more job vacancies with better and higher salaries, raising the economic income of residents.
Additionally
, establishing more factories will contribute to the growth of the economy and increase regional income. When the government imposes higher contributions from companies, the authorities would have a budget to improve their economic and social welfare systems
such
as medical services and public
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
.
As a result
, remote
areas
can become more productive.
For example
, Scandinavian countries, with relatively high tax revenues, have outstanding healthcare, education, and social welfare systems.
However
, the company’s location in a remote area makes it difficult to find qualified employees, slowing the company’s progress.
Furthermore
, pollution often occurs
due to
the remaining combustion of factories in industrial estates.
For instance
, air pollution in Jakarta is significantly influenced by the
coal burning
Add a hyphen
coal-burning
show examples
process from industrial
areas
. In conclusion,
although
corporations demonstrate some disadvantages to the countryside, there is clear evidence that the establishment of commerce in rural
areas
brings clear benefits to economic and industrial advancement
as well as
public services.
Hence
, the positive impact of relocating enterprises to outside urban
areas
clearly
outweigh
Correct subject-verb agreement
outweighs
show examples
the disadvantages.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and fully develops that idea with supporting senteces.
coherence cohesion
Focus on linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly.
task achievement
Remember to present a balanced view by exploring both sides of the argument, ensuring that you address potential drawbacks while highlighting benefits.
task achievement
Use specific examples to illustrate your points, which can help concretize abstract ideas and provide more persuasive arguments.
coherence cohesion
Consider the use of a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to express your ideas more precisely and improve the quality of your essay.

Your opinion

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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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