'Telecommiuting' refers to workers doing their jobs from home for part of each weak and communicating with their office using computer technology. How do you think society will be affected by the growh of telecommuting?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is a rising trend
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
working from anywhere coming from the habit during the quarantine phenomenon.
This
Linking Words
trend surely brings many changes to the society.
This
Linking Words
essay will provide parts of society which are affected by the working transformation. The increasing phenomenon
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
telecommuting has several
impact
Change to a plural noun
impacts
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
people’s activities. First of all, it
brings
Verb problem
has
show examples
impact
Correct article usage
an impact
show examples
on life outside work. The employees can spend more
time
Use synonyms
with others,
such
Linking Words
as their families, friends, and children
while
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
working on their tasks.
This
Linking Words
offers more advantages for employees with double roles.
For example
Linking Words
, working parents can spend more
time
Use synonyms
with their children because they can work
Change preposition
at
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
home
Add an article
the home
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the employees do not have to spend
time
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
commuting and getting ready.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they can do other things right before the office hours begin and after the closing hour directly.
Consequently
Linking Words
, they will spend their
time
Use synonyms
effectively. There are
also
Linking Words
several aspects that will be affected.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
transformation
Correct article usage
the transformation
show examples
to telecommuting
also
Linking Words
affects the environment. By doing their jobs from anywhere, there will be a reduction in traffic congestion because people do not have to commute to their offline
office
Fix the agreement mistake
offices
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
, it will
also
Linking Words
lower the pollution rate since the number of transportation is reduced.
Moreover
Linking Words
, telecommuting will change the management of the company, because the company have to
making
Change the verb
make
show examples
new protocols and procedures for working from anywhere.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it needs several new
adaptation
Change to a plural noun
adaptations
show examples
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, it is
obviously
Change the word
obvious
show examples
that telecommuting will change employees’ daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
to be more flexible with fresher air, but they have to adapt to new management to suit the change.
Submitted by stacya.wijaya20 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
To improve your score in task achievement, ensure that your essay answers all parts of the question thoroughly. While you have made a good attempt to discuss the societal impact of telecommuting, you could benefit from expanding your explanation with more detailed and varied examples.
coherence cohesion
Try to create a more structured approach in order to improve coherence and cohesion. This includes organizing your essay into clear, well-defined paragraphs that each deal with a single main idea. Also, use a wider range of linking phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs seamlessly.
task achievement
When providing examples to support your main points, make sure they are specific and relevant to the topic of telecommuting. Developing these examples in depth will illustrate your points more convincingly and improve your essay's depth of analysis.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Telecommuting
  • Work-life balance
  • Commuter
  • Urban planning
  • Freelancing
  • Collaboration
  • Digital divide
  • Remote supervision
  • Commercial real estate
  • Performance evaluation
  • Home office
  • Environmental pollution
  • Socioeconomic
  • Contract-based jobs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: