IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the graph below shows the unemployment rates in the USA and Japan between march 1993 and march 1999.

the graph below shows the unemployment rates in the USA and Japan between march 1993 and march 1999.
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the line graph gives information about the percentage of the unemployment
rates
Use synonyms
 in the
USA
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 and
Japan
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 from March 1993 to March 1999.
Overall
Linking Words
, The unemployment
rates
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 in
Japan
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 show a significant rise over the period,
However
Linking Words
, the
rates
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 in the
USA
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experience
Wrong verb form
experienced
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 a downward trend. The percentage of
Use synonyms
Add an article
the work
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work
Correct your spelling
workforce
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force
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 in
Japan
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 increases gradually to 4.4% in Mar 96,
then
Linking Words
 it suddenly
decrease
Change the verb form
decreases
show examples
 to 3.8 % between Mar 96 and Mar 97, and
then
Linking Words
 it has a gradual increase to reach its peak value which is 5.25% between Mar 98 and Mar 99,
Finally
Linking Words
, it experiences a fall in
Use synonyms
work
Correct your spelling
workforce
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force
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 until the end of Mar 99. The
Use synonyms
work
Correct your spelling
workforce
show examples
force
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
rates
Fix the agreement mistake
rate
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 in the
USA
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 is much higher than that in
Japan
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 by 5% in Mar 93,
then
Linking Words
 it declines to be almost the same rate as
Japan
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 between Mar 98 and Mar 99 ,
Moreover
Linking Words
, the rate of change in the
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work
Correct your spelling
workforce
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force
Use synonyms
 in
Japan
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 is much higher than that in the
USA
Use synonyms
 from Mar 93 to Mar 98.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words rates, usa, japan, work, force with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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