In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In our contemporary society, there are always a few
people
who have extremely high income
in some countries. Some Fix the agreement mistake
incomes
people
opine that this
phenomenon has positive
impact on a country, but some Add an article
a positive
people
think that the government
should control the income
and set a limit
on the income
that one can earn. This
essay will examine both views and will discuss why I am of the view that government
should not Correct article usage
the government
limit
the amount people
can earn.
On one hand, the rich will become richer and the poor will become poorer,
if the Remove the comma
apply
government
does not intervene. Without setting any upper limit
on the
Correct article usage
apply
income
, the rich will continue to grow their 'empire' through their investment portfolios. Those multi-billionnaires
make up Correct your spelling
multi-billionaires
of
less than 1% of the Change preposition
apply
world
's population, but nearly half of the world
's wealth is owned by them, highlighting the issue of global inequality. The rich can easily dominate the world
's economy, including Correct article usage
the share's
share's
market and Change noun form
share
property's
market.
Change noun form
property
On the other hand
, we live in a world
with emphasis
on human Correct article usage
an emphasis
rights
and freedom. The rich has
their Change the verb form
have
rights
and should have their
Change the word
the
rights
to earn money as much as they want. They too, sacrifice their time and they normally Fix the agreement mistake
right
work
harder than anyone else to reach where they are today. Government
has no Correct article usage
The government
rights
to tell them they cannot earn more money if they are capable Fix the agreement mistake
right
to do
so. Change preposition
of doing
Furthermore
, a lot of the high
Add a hyphen
high-income
income
earners actually did a lot of charity work
and contribute
back to Wrong verb form
contributed
the
society. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, the
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg and Tesla founder, Elon Musk, Correct article usage
apply
they
donated substantial funds to charity and research to improve Correct pronoun usage
apply
human's
quality of life and to cure life-threatening diseases.
It is Change noun form
human
therefore
, in my view, government
should not limit
the amount people
can earn. This
is because the government
has no rights
to do so and the Fix the agreement mistake
right
high
Add a hyphen
high-income
income
earners work
hard to achieve everything they have today. Government
should instead
, work
on policies and budgets that can help to improve the poor's quality of life.Submitted by michellehoon0924 on
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Introduction
Ensure that your introduction clearly states the topic and outlines the views you will discuss. It is also beneficial to hint at your own view in the introduction to set the stage for the conclusion.
Coherence
Aim to include a variety of cohesive devices to link your ideas more smoothly, such as 'however', 'nevertheless', 'for instance'.
Cohesion
Each paragraph should have one clear main idea, supported by detailed examples. Develop your examples further to strengthen your argument.
Task Achievement
Make sure to provide a balanced discussion of both views before stating your opinion. It is important to dedicate roughly equal space to each viewpoint.
Conclusion
Your conclusion should summarize both sides of the argument and clearly state your opinion, providing a sense of closure to the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.