In some countries, young people do not take care of their elderly relatives. Instead, they appoint trained professionals who take care of the elderly. Is it a positive or a negative tend according to you?
In
sevral
countries Correct your spelling
several
arong
the world professional services are obtained to take Correct your spelling
around
care
of elderly parents by their younger relatives. I belive
Correct your spelling
believe
this
is negative development as ample reasons to substantialte
it.
First and foremost, the advocates for professional service for elder Correct your spelling
substantiate
care
claim that it will provide best
nursing Correct article usage
the best
care
for the elder people
. In other words
, the
professional Correct article usage
apply
people
would look the
parents in a professional way compared to the offspring which is beneficial for their health. Change preposition
at the
For example
, according to
the World Health Organisation report, the
50% of Correct article usage
apply
death
by Fix the agreement mistake
deaths
cardio vascular
Correct your spelling
cardiovascular
attack
can be prevented by Fix the agreement mistake
attacks
the
proper first aid Correct article usage
apply
in
immediately. Change preposition
apply
Moreover
, the relatives would need to focus also
for
their professional life, the Change preposition
on
people
who need to travel for their job purpose.
However
, the offspring have the resposibility
to take Correct your spelling
responsibility
care
their
elderly parents. The elder Change preposition
of their
people
require more compassion and emotional support along with
the
physical support. Correct article usage
apply
In other words
, the blood relatives are the suitable people
to provide care
for them rather than a
Change the article
an
aquire
professional service. To illustrate, Correct your spelling
acquire
the
recent survey conducted by Oxford University indicated that Correct article usage
a
the
geriatric Correct article usage
apply
people
who residing
at their Change the form of the verb
reside
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
is
healthier than old Correct subject-verb agreement
are
care
home
.
In conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
homes
the
professional elder Correct article usage
apply
care
services are more convenient and
Correct word choice
apply
for
elder Change preposition
apply
people
and offspring
can focus on their professional life. Correct pronoun usage
their offspring
However
, the
older Correct article usage
apply
people
require emotional and compassion along with
physical support, ergo, I belive
it is a negative development.Correct your spelling
believe
Submitted by ck.manshad on
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introduction conclusion present
Ensure clarity in your introduction by stating your position clearly with no spelling or grammatical errors. Make sure your introduction and conclusion are distinct and effectively encapsulate your argument.
supported main points
Develop your ideas more fully by expanding your explanations and providing more detailed examples. This will showcase a better understanding and ability to discuss issues in depth.
complete response
Make sure your essay directly addresses all parts of the task prompt; this includes clearly stating whether the trend is positive or negative and providing ample support for this view.
logical structure
Work on organizing your ideas more clearly and ensure seamless transitions between them. Create a logical flow that guides the reader through your argument effectively.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strengthen each paragraph with clear and comprehensive ideas that provide a deep analysis of the issue. Avoid generalizations and aim to give nuanced perspectives.
relevant specific examples
Include relevant and specific examples to substantiate your claims. The examples should be clearly connected to the main argument and enhance the persuasive element of your essay.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.