Some people think that intelligence is innate, while others think that we can improve our intelligence through learning. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Some people contend that

intelligence

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is innate,

while

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others hold a diametrically opposing view and opine that one can

strenghthen

Correct your spelling

strengthen

our

intelligence

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through learning.

This

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essay will examine both views and

will

Verb problem

apply

show examples

weigh

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apply

show examples

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

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merits. On one hand, some argue that

intelligence

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is innate. The obvious example will be someone

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who is

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gifted in their own spheres

such

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maths

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, physics, music or sports. We have heard news reporting some extremely young genius won the

world-wide

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worldwide

show examples

maths

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competition, or some talented children completed university when their peers

were

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had

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just started secondary

schools

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school

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. All these facts are

the

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apply

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solid proof

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that

show examples

intelligence

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is innate.

However

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, we must always bear in mind that those

genious

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geniuses

who succeeded at a very young age, they, too, went through a lot of practices and

trainings

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training

pieces of training

show examples

before reaching where they are today.

Therefore

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, I support the saying that

intelligence

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is innate, but I

also

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trust that one can improve his or her

intelligence

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through learning.

This

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is because 'practice makes perfect'. Take

maths

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as an example, if a student is interested in

maths

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but he is not good at it, he can still excel

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in it

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

if he practices harder and does not give up. I believe determination is always the key to success. Some

sportmen

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sportsmen

might not show any talent when they started training, but through constant

practices

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practice

show examples

, they could even perform better than those who were talented. In conclusion, I agree that

intelligence

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is innate based on the examples given above.

However

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, I

also

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believe that we can improve our

intelligence

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through learning simply because practice makes perfect and determination is the key to success.

Submitted by michellehoon0924 on Thu Jan 25 2024

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task achievement

While the essay addresses both views, consider providing more detailed explanations and delve deeper into each argument. Expand on why some believe intelligence is innate while others think it can be improved through learning, using clearer topic sentences and more developed supporting sentences.

coherence and cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, work on smooth transitions between ideas. Break down paragraphs logically, use a variety of linking words, and ensure the conclusion succinctly summarizes the points made in the essay without introducing new information.

task achievement

For a stronger essay, support each point with clear examples and evidence. Add more details to the anecdotal evidence provided, potentially including statistics or well-known studies to reinforce the arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Some people think that intelligence is innate, while others think that we can improve our intelligence through learning. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Your opinion

In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Some employers involve employees in the decision-making process of products and services. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

Some people think that good health is very important to every person, so medical services should not be run by profit-making companies. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh the disadvantages?

Million of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?