Some people think that intelligence is innate, while others think that we can improve our intelligence through learning. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #intelligence

Some people contend that

intelligence

is innate,

while

others hold a diametrically opposing view and opine that one can

strenghthen

Correct your spelling

strengthen

our

intelligence

through learning.

This

essay will examine both views and

will

Verb problem

apply

show examples

weigh

Change preposition

apply

show examples

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

merits. On one hand, some argue that

intelligence

is innate. The obvious example will be someone

Correct pronoun usage

who is

show examples

gifted in their own spheres

such

maths

, physics, music or sports. We have heard news reporting some extremely young genius won the

world-wide

Correct your spelling

worldwide

show examples

maths

competition, or some talented children completed university when their peers

were

Verb problem

had

show examples

just started secondary

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

. All these facts are

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

solid proof

Change preposition

that

show examples

intelligence

is innate.

However

, we must always bear in mind that those

genious

Correct your spelling

geniuses

who succeeded at a very young age, they, too, went through a lot of practices and

trainings

Change the wording

training

pieces of training

show examples

before reaching where they are today.

Therefore

, I support the saying that

intelligence

is innate, but I

also

trust that one can improve his or her

intelligence

through learning.

This

is because 'practice makes perfect'. Take

maths

as an example, if a student is interested in

maths

but he is not good at it, he can still excel

Change preposition

in it

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

if he practices harder and does not give up. I believe determination is always the key to success. Some

sportmen

Correct your spelling

sportsmen

might not show any talent when they started training, but through constant

practices

Fix the agreement mistake

practice

show examples

, they could even perform better than those who were talented. In conclusion, I agree that

intelligence

is innate based on the examples given above.

However

, I

also

believe that we can improve our

intelligence

through learning simply because practice makes perfect and determination is the key to success.

Submitted by michellehoon0924 on Thu Jan 25 2024

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task achievement

While the essay addresses both views, consider providing more detailed explanations and delve deeper into each argument. Expand on why some believe intelligence is innate while others think it can be improved through learning, using clearer topic sentences and more developed supporting sentences.

coherence and cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, work on smooth transitions between ideas. Break down paragraphs logically, use a variety of linking words, and ensure the conclusion succinctly summarizes the points made in the essay without introducing new information.

task achievement

For a stronger essay, support each point with clear examples and evidence. Add more details to the anecdotal evidence provided, potentially including statistics or well-known studies to reinforce the arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

270 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that intelligence is innate, while others think that we can improve our intelligence through learning. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Due to the increasing world demands for oil and gas energy, people need to look for new resources of energy in remote and untouched natural places. Do the advantages of locating these sources outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries, fast food become spart of everyday life. It affects people’s lifestyle and diet as well. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and relevant examples.

A rise in the standard of living in a country often only seems to benefit cities rather than rural areas. What problems can this cause? How might these problems be reduced?