Many elderly people are no longer looked after by their families But are put in care homes or nursing homes. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?
older
people
are not cared by
their Change preposition
for by
familes
rather are put in Correct your spelling
families
care
homes
or nursing homes
. This
essay discusses that better mental kela and socializing environment are the main advantages of this
, but loss of family care
and connection
and cause of anxiety
and depression
are the primary disadvantages.
The main advantages
of Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
care
homes
for elder people
are
,in Correct subject-verb agreement
is
care
homes
where they can easily socialize themselves
with other Correct pronoun usage
apply
people
around them and
which leads to better mental health. In Correct word choice
apply
case
of Correct article usage
the case
families
with high working circumstances where they donot
have time to Correct your spelling
do not
care
and
speak with older Change preposition
for and
people
of
their family. In Change preposition
in
this
case
nursing Add a comma
case,
homes
act as a place where they fid
more Correct your spelling
find
people
to speak and share their feelings and emotions which helps them to cope with mental problem
like loneliness. Fix the agreement mistake
problems
For instance
, in countries like the United States and United
Correct article usage
the United
Kingdom
most of Add a comma
Kingdom,
thier
family Correct your spelling
their
the
member
who Fix the agreement mistake
members
is
older are put in Correct subject-verb agreement
are
care
homes
in replacement for thier
own home because of Correct your spelling
their
lack
of time to Correct article usage
a lack
care
for them. In this
case
, care
homes
provide an
another family environment to help them to live a happy and better life.
Despite these advantages, elder Remove the article
apply
people
lose care
and connection
from their families
which leads to depression
and anxiety
. As we age older, we people
need more care
and connection
from our families
. In case
of Correct article usage
the case
care
homes
, where they can not find much care
and connection
which they can find in families
. For example
, in the United Kingdom, most of the old aged
Correct word choice
apply
people
in care
homes
are struggling with depression
and anxiety
because they lack connection
where they earlier received from their Correct article usage
the connection
families
.
In conclusion, elder people
can socialize themselves better in care
homes
which is good for their mental health. Despite of
Change preposition
apply
this
the primary disadvantages
is they Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
loss
Replace the word
lose
connection
from
their Change preposition
with
families
which leads to depression
and anxiety
.Submitted by insighttribez on
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coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea, and fully develop it with supporting sentences.
coherence cohesion
Work on logical flow and transitions between ideas and paragraphs for better coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Rephrase the introduction and conclusion to clearly state your topic and summarise your main points without repetition.
task achievement
Ensure you address both parts of the question equally, discussing both the advantages and disadvantages with two or more points for each.
task achievement
Provide clear and specific examples to support your arguments.
task achievement
Check your work for grammatical errors and correct them for better clarity and professionalism.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.