Nowadays, families are not as close as in the past and a lot of people have become used to this. Explain the reasons for this and discuss any possible effects it may have on society.
In
this
day and age, it is widely found that the family relationship plays a less important in human growth. This
situation is caused by several reasons. Personally, it has more demerits than merits.
Firstly
, at the present time
, society is improving day-by-day
. Our lives are boosted, and there are many new technologies. Correct your spelling
day by day
Therefore
, development
of technology Correct article usage
the development
influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
relationship
in Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
family
. Add an article
the family
This
can create an adverse bearing on the development of the nation. Furthermore
, it might take a toll on a family’s tradition. The people
might have to spend a lot of Correct article usage
People
time
for
Change preposition
on
work
and do
not pay attention to the things around them. Unnecessary verb
apply
For example
, my father often works late into the night to earn money for my family because he is a breadwinner. Money attracts our family members
to chase it, and that declines our family interactions. As a result
, he does not have enough time
to spend on
family, hindering the family relationships. Change preposition
with
Moreover
, modern technology also
means that people are more focus
on their online Replace the word
focused
life
than interacting with their family in their free Fix the agreement mistake
lives
time
. For instance
, nowadays, children spend almost time
for
playing video games or Change preposition
apply
call with
friends on the internet, Wrong verb form
calling
instead
of connecting with their family.
Not only that, it makes mealtime more than just a time
to eat and less meal
with full Fix the agreement mistake
fewer meals
members
. The family members
do not have as much time
to spend with each other as they did in the past. Because, they have grown up day-by-day
, so that they do not as close as before. Correct your spelling
day by day
For example
, during the meal, everyone in the house does not communicate, they do their own thing such
as play games, read
online newspapers. Correct word choice
and read
In addition
, meals without enough members
are conventional, for different reasons such
as having to travel far for work
.
In conclusion, the reasons cause
Verb problem
apply
that
human become less interactive with their families, can be physical distance, Correct word choice
why
concentrate
more on Wrong verb form
concentrating
work
and the modern evolution of a social. We should actively balance work
, life and family, so as not to be indifferent in today’s development period.Submitted by dohuyhoang on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supporting details. Transition between ideas smoothly to help the reader follow your argument.
introduction conclusion present
Introduce your essay with a clear paraphrase of the question and a brief outline of your view. Conclude by summarizing your main points and reiterating your opinion.
supported main points
Develop your main points by providing clear reasons and specific examples. Avoid overgeneralizations.
complete response
Expand your response to fully address all parts of the task. Clearly present your views and discuss both causes and effects.
clear comprehensive ideas
Focus on clarity and detail to ensure that your ideas are comprehensively explained. Use a range of sentence structures and vocabulary to add depth to your essay.
relevant specific examples
Include a variety of relevant, specific examples to support your points. These can be drawn from personal experience, historical events, or hypothetical scenarios.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!