IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The three charts below show the value in Australian dollars of Australian trade with three different countries from 2004 to 2009. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.

The three charts below show the value in Australian dollars of Australian trade with three different countries from 2004 to 2009. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.
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The given charts
illustrates
Change the verb form
illustrate
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 the progression of Australian international trade with multiple countries
such
Linking Words
 as
China
Use synonyms
, Japan, and
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 States between 2004 and 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that Australia witnessed a trend of falling import
Use synonyms
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
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 in all countries.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 can be said to export
level
Use synonyms
, with the exception of
China
Use synonyms
 which experienced a rise
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. Imports
level
Use synonyms
 generally started from around 20 billion dollars in 2004 for all countries. In the following three years, it saw no significant change
to
Change preposition
in
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 the number.
This
Linking Words
 is not for long
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
, however
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, as 2007 marked a different scenario for
China
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
China
Use synonyms
 gradually increased to just below 30 billion dollars, there is hardly any noticeable positive climb for others.
China
Use synonyms
 eventually hit its peak at the same
level
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and continued with the same proportion as it was the year after, surpassing Japan and America by 10%. Exports
level
Use synonyms
on the other hand
Linking Words
 showed a more intriguing picture. At the beginning of the period,
China
Use synonyms
 scored
last
Linking Words
 in terms of position. Yet, it gradually climbed by around 20% in the span of 5 years. Japan presented a more shocking fluctuation as it rose to just below 30% by 2005. The amount stayed relatively steady before it saw a drastic jump to around 40% in 2008.
This
Linking Words
 number
however
Linking Words
 plummeted by 10% in the following year. Regarding
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 States, the number is stable with
slight
Add an article
a slight
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 change in 2008.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words china, level with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "climb" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just below" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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