Many people believe that it's better to learn something in a gorup, rather than learning it individually. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #gorup

Most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

individuals think that

learn

Wrong verb form

learning

show examples

somthing

Correct your spelling

something

in a team is better than learn in lonelyness. I completely agree with

this

idea and I will

explane

Correct your spelling

explain

with some examples in

this

essay. First of all , it is crystal clear that

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

has been created as a sociable creature in the world ; in fact , no one could not live alone and it is necessary for us to be in a group of people ;

for example

, consider a man who is living alone in a foreign country and he does not communicate with anybody ,

although

, he wants to learn the language of that region ;

however

, he

try

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tries

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a lot to learn the new language as a

self study

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self-study

show examples

, he could not be

succesfull

Correct your spelling

successful

in it ;

as a result

, learning

language

Add an article

a language

the language

show examples

in a group is easier than learning in private.

Secondly

, needless to

say

Add the comma(s)

say,

show examples

that learning in a

gruop

Correct your spelling

group

is more

activate

Replace the word

active

show examples

and competitive than individually ; to illustrate , during the

pandamic

Correct your spelling

pandemic

some of

children

Add an article

the children

show examples

studied at home in their own privacy and they got used to

this

way of studying ; as a matter of fact , they forgot the competitions when they go back to school as before ;

accordingly

, should the students practice their lessons in groups , they would be more active and competitive after the quarantine.

To conclude

, in

reaffirm

Wrong verb form

reaffirming

show examples

the above ideas that mentioned the sociable charectaricity and competitivity of

humanbeing

Correct your spelling

human beings

, I agree with

this

view about learning in

gruop

Correct your spelling

group

groups

is much

Change the word

apply

show examples

better than learning

Change preposition

apply

show examples

individually at all.

Submitted by sajad.bazdar.2012 on Fri Jan 26 2024

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Introduction & Conclusion

Ensure the introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion. The introduction in this essay is a bit vague and could be better structured to directly address the question.

Paragraphing & Main Ideas

To improve coherence and cohesion, make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the supporting sentences are directly related to this main idea.

Use of Examples

When providing examples, they should be specific and directly relevant to the point you're making. The examples in this essay are a bit general and lack specific details that would make them more convincing.

Avoid using informal or non-academic expressions such as 'learn somthing in a team' or 'learn in lonelyness'. Instead, use formal academic expressions like 'learn something in a group setting' or 'learn individually'.

Spelling & Grammar

Be aware of spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors such as 'gruop' instead of 'group', 'activiate' instead of 'active', and 'competitivity'. It is essential to proofread your essay to avoid these mistakes.

Conclusion

Make sure the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay and reiterates your opinion. The conclusion in this essay could be more coherent with the rest of the content.

Sentence Structure

Work on varying your sentence structures to effectively demonstrate your English abilities. This includes using a range of complex structures, which are somewhat lacking in this essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many people believe that it's better to learn something in a gorup, rather than learning it individually. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Increasingly, many young people are deciding to work or study in other countries. Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Employees should not work in jobs they don’t enjoy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people claim that the government should provide free health care. Others think that the government will not provide the most innovative methods of treatment and it’s better to invest those funds in education and culture. What is your opinion?

In some countries, more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this question?

Education should be accessible to people of all economic backgrounds. All levels of education, from primary school to tertiary education, should be free. To what extend do you agree with?