Some people think young people are not suitable for important positions in the government，while other people think it is a good idea for young people to take on these positions. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Every person whether young or experienced has the same opportunity to take on important
positions
in government
structure due to
their capability, academic background, etcetera. Some assume that young people
are not proper enough for crucial positions
, while
others argue that it is a good idea for young people
to take on these positions
.
The following essay will present both points of view about this
phenomenon and present my point of view.
On one hand, young people
are more likely to bring much-needed change to the government
's performance. With their updated knowledge and technology savviness, young people
can upgrade the government
’s system for better results if they are given the opportunity to occupy important positions
in government
. As an example, young officials
with their modern knowledge of technology and creativity, can change the older government
's system service from manual to electronic servicing, in cases such
as making identity cards for residents. Due to
the example that I mentioned above, I believe that giving important positions
to young people
is a good idea which can improve the government
's performance.
Many others, however
, are opposed and believe that young people
are not suitable for important positions
in the government
. They assume that young people
are not proper enough for crucial positions
because of some reasons like the lack of experience. Besides
academic qualifications,to handle government
affairs, the other skills that are required are officials
must be good enough in management, communications and decision-making skills. These competencies are usually owned by senior officials
rather than young officials
, who have many experience for many years in government
. Consequently
, this
argument makes some people
believe that young people
are not suitable for important positions
.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that giving the opportunity to young people
in some strategic and important positions
in the government
is a good idea, but also
in collaboration with senior officials
. Eventually, the main factors for someone whether junior or senior to occupy important positions
in the government
are academic and management skills.Submitted by Deddymus on
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Task Achievement
To enhance your task achievement score, ensure that your discussion of both viewpoints is balanced and fully developed. Provide clear, comprehensive ideas with a detailed explanation.
Coherence and Cohesion
To strengthen your coherence and cohesion, focus on creating clear topic sentences and ensure subsequent sentences flow logically from them. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to create coherent paragraphs and aim for clear, logical progression of ideas throughout the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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