Some people believe that children have the freedom to make mistakes, while others argue that adults should prevent them from doing so. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #freedom #mistakes #adults

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Whether

kids

Use synonyms

are able to make

mistakes

Use synonyms

has

arose

Verb problem

raised

show examples

heat

Replace the word

heated

show examples

discussion.

Someone

Correct your spelling

Some

show examples

claims

Correct subject-verb agreement

claim

show examples

that

this

Linking Words

action

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

ought to be avoided by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

adults

Use synonyms

. I

am partially agree

Change the verb form

partially agree

show examples

with

this

Linking Words

view. To start with, the reason why young people will make an error is because they haven’t experienced enough. They still have curiosity

Change preposition

about

show examples

those things, even though their parents or people

surrounded

Wrong verb form

surrounding

show examples

said

Correct pronoun usage

them said

show examples

not to do so.

For example

Linking Words

kids

Use synonyms

fall over on the street as they do not watch out the road

during

Change preposition

while

show examples

running, which is reminded by their parents in advance.

As a result

Linking Words

, these

kids

Use synonyms

feel hurt and will do that again because they know next time they will have a fall again if they do not be careful

about

Change preposition

show examples

the road. What ‘s more, the methods or the solution

that is

Linking Words

said to be correct are made from making

mistakes

Use synonyms

. If

kids

Use synonyms

do not have

chance

Correct article usage

a chance

show examples

to screw up things one or two times they will not grow up as they do not know how to make up for their

wrong

Fix the agreement mistake

wrongs

show examples

However

Linking Words

, some

mistakes

Use synonyms

cannot be allowed

such

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

commit

Wrong verb form

committing

show examples

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

violate

Wrong verb form

violating

show examples

others and

take

Wrong verb form

taking

show examples

drugs. Even though

adults

Use synonyms

cannot control themselves from

drugs

Fix the agreement mistake

drug

show examples

addicted

Replace the word

addiction

show examples

Therefore

Linking Words

, Children do have

freedom

Add an article

the freedom

show examples

to make an error but it depends on how severe the mistake is.

Thus

Linking Words

Adults

Use synonyms

should provide them

Add the preposition

with a

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

right value of judgement and prevent them

to violate

Change preposition

from violating

show examples

the law.

To conclude

Linking Words

, some small

mistakes

Use synonyms

can be made and

adults

Use synonyms

can give appropriate guidance to solve questions. But grown

man

Fix the agreement mistake

men

show examples

should not permit

kids

Use synonyms

to break the law because they could not take

price

Add an article

the price

show examples

of it.

Submitted by 52YANGYANG on Sun Jan 28 2024

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Introduction and Conclusion

Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are clear and fully developed. The introduction should clearly present the topic and outline the structure of your essay. The conclusion should summarize the main points made and restate your own opinion.

Logical Structure

Work on the logical flow of the essay. Connect your ideas more smoothly, and use a range of linking words and phrases to create a coherent argument. Paragraphs should have clear main ideas and all sentences should be relevant to the main topic.

Support and Examples

Offer more developed and specific examples to support your arguments. This strengthens your essay by providing evidence for your claims. Make sure the examples are directly relevant to the topic and clearly explained.

Task Completion

Fully address all parts of the task to ensure a complete response. This includes discussing both views and giving your own opinion with sufficient detail. Spend enough time fleshing out each part of the prompt to achieve a balanced essay.

Clarity and Comprehensiveness

Strive for clarity in expressing your ideas. Aim to express your points comprehensively with clarity and precision. Avoid ambiguity or overly complex structures that may confuse the reader.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

freedom to make mistakes
critical thinking skills
lifelong learning
guided learning environment
resilience
independence
overprotective
dependency
problem-solving skills
confidence
negative consequences
learning process
personal growth
trial and error
balance safety and learning
development
support and guidance
empowerment
risk-taking
life lessons

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Some people believe that children have the freedom to make mistakes, while others argue that adults should prevent them from doing so. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Sales companies should recruit people who are hungry for money as they will make the most dedicated workers.Do you think money is the driving force behind hard work? What factors should be taken into consideration when recruiting staff for sales positions

TOO MUCH EMPHASIS IS GIVEN FOR EDUCATION OF THE YOUNG . MORE GOVERNMENT MONEY SHOULD BE SPENT TO FREE TIME ACTIVITY OF YOUNG PEOPLE

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, more people are migrating to other countries than ever before. In order to become integrated into society in their adopted countries, immigrants should abandon their old ways and adapt to local custom and codes of behavior. Do you agree or disagree ?