For a long time art has been considered an essential part of all cultures in the world. However, nowadays people’s values have changed, and we tend to consider science, technology and business more important than arts. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to draw people’s attention to art?

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For centuries,

art

Use synonyms

has been

integral

Change the article

an integral

show examples

part of diverse

culture

Fix the agreement mistake

cultures

show examples

worldwide, reflecting the creativity and identity of communities.

However

Linking Words

, contemporary values have shifted towards prioritizing science,

technology

Use synonyms

, and business over the arts. These essays explore the causes behind

this

Linking Words

change and suggest ways to rekindle society’s appreciation for

art

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. There are

number

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a number

the number

show examples

of reasons

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

why

this

Linking Words

trend happened. One reason for the diminished emphasis on

art

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lies in the prevailing economic mindset. Modern societies often prioritize fields like science,

technology

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, and business

due to

Linking Words

perception

Correct article usage

the perception

show examples

of stability and financial success. The rapid growth of

technology

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plays a significant role in reshaping societal values.

For Instance

Linking Words

, people

making

Wrong verb form

make

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money from

technology

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in many ways like

create

Change the form of the verb

creating

show examples

digital products, online selling, freelancing and so on. Meanwhile,

work

Correct article usage

a work

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

art

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almost can do the same thing.

Although

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

this

Linking Words

is a common

mind set

Correct your spelling

mindset

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among people now, there are several actions that could be taken into account to mitigate the mentioned problem.

Firstly

Linking Words

, our country should organize more

art

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galleries supported by famous people or our government, which are great opportunities for our inhabitants and for visitors to know more about our national

arts

Fix the agreement mistake

art

show examples

and why it is irreplaceable. Students had better have more compulsory projects

traditional

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in traditional

show examples

arts in school.

Correct your spelling

show examples

illustrate that every school would be arranged to visit the

art

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galleries and

museum

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museums

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who are the students free of cost in order to will create thinking

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show examples

this

Linking Words

field. In conclusion, there are various factors leading to the conception that

art

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has not been vital anymore.

However

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, I strongly believe there are measures that we can implement right away to tackle

this

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issue.

shahidumer01 Mon Jan 29 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that the introduction clearly outlines the causes and solutions to the issue. Develop a thesis statement that guides the essay's direction.

task achievement

Provide specific, clear examples for each cause and solution you mention. Avoid general statements and focus on concrete instances or research.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay with clear, logical paragraphs. Each paragraph should have one main idea supported by examples or explanations.

coherence cohesion

Link your ideas with cohesive devices like transition words or phrases to help the reader follow your argument easily and understand the relationship between your points.

coherence cohesion

In your conclusion, succinctly summarize the main causes and proposed solutions. Restate your thesis and ensure it reminds the reader of your main points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

STEM fields (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics)
evolve
technological advancements
overshadowing
financial pressures
practical careers
digital entertainment
accessible
integrated
curricula
fostering
emotional intelligence
public art projects
engage
interactive

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Your opinion

Some people believe that everyone has a right to have access to university education and that governments should make it free for all students no matter what financial background they have. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Films and computer games which contain violence are very popular. Some people believe that they have a negative effect on society and so should be banned. Other people, however, say that they are just harmless and help people to relax. Discuss both points of view and five your own opinion.

Some people think that government should ban dangerous sports while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activities. Discuss both view

In some cities, public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own food and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With the increased use of computers, the Internet and smartphones, more and more people are starting to work from home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?