Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local language. If these are not taught many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?

This
topic is like the two sides of a coin. Learning
english
Change the capitalization
English
show examples
at school is important because it is the
language
that is
used globally.
However
, learning
local
Add an article
the local
show examples
language
is
also
important to preserve our original culture. To balance the two
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
,
local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
language
has to be taught
also
at school
according to
where the school is founded. Learning
local
Add an article
the local
show examples
language
can
also
enrich our knowledge about who we are and our culture, and we can always
also
learn
others'
Change preposition
about others'
show examples
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
.
Submitted by epindonta02 on

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coherence cohesion
To improve your coherence and cohesion, focus on creating a clear logical structure within your essay. Begin with a strong introduction, followed by body paragraphs each dedicated to a specific point, and conclude with a summarised ending. Use transition words to connect ideas smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion need to be more clearly defined and distinct. Ensure that your introduction sets the tone for the upcoming arguments and your conclusion effectively wraps up your discussion.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with detailed examples and explanations. While you made an attempt to address the prompt, the examples were generic. More specific and vivid examples will strengthen your argument.
task achievement
To fully accomplish the task, you need to address all parts of the question and provide a more balanced discussion on both the importance of learning English and the preservation of local languages. Include specific suggestions on how to ensure the survival of local languages.
task achievement
Clearly express your ideas and ensure that they are comprehensive by fully developing your arguments. Each point you make should be elaborated with explanations or examples, which are currently lacking depth.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points about the importance of learning English and local languages. Personal anecdotes or cultural insights would add depth to your argument and satisfy the task requirements.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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