In some societies, more and more people are deciding to live alone. Why do you think this is? Do the advantages of living alone outweigh the disadvantages?

#societies #people

An increasing number of individuals prefer to live without any partner. In

this

essay, I will elucidate the factors that contribute towards

this

problem and give my opinion about how the drawbacks overshadow the benefits. After graduating with

bachelor's

Correct article usage

a bachelor's

show examples

degree, many youngsters start to find a job or move to another city. They start to create their career journey and earn some money to live. After many years, some of them considered to married and others prefer to live alone.

This

trend of living alone increased currently because they are too busy with their work and enjoy their routine. Other things that might cause

this

issue are

also

because they do not have adequate money to have a partner or family.

Therefore

, partnerless nowadays is considered

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a normal way for

people

to live in the long run. To illustrate, some

people

are trapped in the sandwich generation, they should pay for their

parent's

Change noun form

parents'

show examples

needs and themselves.

Thus

, they are afraid if they start their own family, they will not afford it. Living alone sounds fun because they only think about themselves.

However

, in a long period, these circumstances may cause a big problem.

Firstly

, as

people

are getting older,

then

their circle might

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

get smaller.

People

who are live solo

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

could be trapped in loneliness and bored with their routine.

Secondly

, individuals

also

experience a decreased

health

Replace the word

healthy

show examples

body and may be dependent on others.

This

would be a big issue if someone lives without a partner or family.

For example

, many old

people

are living in nursing homes because they do not have any relatives to live with. In conclusion, the reason

people

live alone is because they enjoy it and have financial issues. I,

therefore

, remain firmly convinced that the disadvantages are eclipsed by the advantages.

Submitted by 2024successielts on Mon Jan 29 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your essay provides a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is good. However, the logical flow between ideas can be improved by using a wider range of cohesive devices and creating clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.

logical structure

In the introduction, ensure that you restate the question clearly and present your thesis statement. The conclusion should definitively state your opinion by summarizing the main points made throughout the essay.

supported main points

Support your main points with more detailed examples and explanations. Avoid general statements and strive to provide specific evidence or experiences to strengthen your arguments.

task achievement

Your essay touches upon the topic, but to fully respond to the task, make sure to address all parts of the prompt. Discuss both the reasons behind the trend of living alone and balance your essay by considering both the advantages and disadvantages equally before giving your opinion.

clear comprehensive ideas

Using transitional phrases more effectively and varying your sentence structure can help with the clarity and comprehensibility of your ideas, making the essay easier to follow for the reader.

relevant specific examples

Including specific and relevant examples will add depth to your essay and demonstrate a better understanding of the topic. These can come from your own knowledge or hypothetical situations that clearly illustrate your points.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

299 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

individualism
solitude
self-sufficiency
empowerment
autonomy
loneliness
mental well-being
financial independence
social isolation
personal growth
economic strain
urbanization

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In some societies, more and more people are deciding to live alone. Why do you think this is? Do the advantages of living alone outweigh the disadvantages?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

At present the population of some countries include a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer with relevant example.

In some countries the average weight to people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve the problem?