You have bought a new camera but when you got it home you found it had some problems. You returned the camera and spoke to the company representative a week ago but the camera has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter: Introduce yourself Explain the situation Say what action you would like the company to take

#camera #home #company #representative #week #situation #action

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Dear Sir Or Madam, I am writing to express my dissatisfaction regarding your service . My name is Sunny and I am a photographer. I want to inform you that On November 24, I purchased a new Canon

camera

from your showroom . Actually, when I reached home

then

I noticed that there was some problem with the

camera

. When I clicked a picture, the pixels were not clear. Immediately, I rushed back to your shop and informed your salesman about all the issues. He checked it properly and told me that its lens was not properly fixed. Being a photographer I need to photoshoot every day so I suggest your employee to

fixed

Change the form of the verb

fix

show examples

it or replace the

camera

as soon as possible .

However

, it was the

last

piece in your shop and your employee tried to fix it and it took almost 2 hours but

at the end

, he said we will replace your

camera

and deliver to your home within 2 days. Honestly, I really feel disappointed , It has been one week but still, I did not get my

camera

. As I am a professional I cannot wait anymore because it affects my whole work. Could you please deliver my

camera

as soon as possible

otherwise

I need my refund. Looking forward to your prompt response. Yours faithfully, Sunny Garg.

Submitted by sunnygarg710 on Tue Jan 30 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

The letter is structured fairly well, with a clear introduction and paragraphs that mostly focus on single ideas. However, the transitions between the ideas could be smoother, which would strengthen the overall coherence and cohesion of the letter.

coherence cohesion

Your greeting and closing are appropriate, but to enhance the formality of the letter, consider including the name of the representative if it is known, or a more specific department within the company. This would make the letter more direct and personal.

task achievement

You've done well in addressing all parts of the prompt efficiently. To strengthen your task achievement further, consider providing a bit more detail about the impact this issue has had on your work, which can emphasize the urgency of your request.

task achievement

The tone of the writing is mostly suitable for a formal complaint letter. To enhance the formality, avoid using contractions (e.g., replace 'I'm' with 'I am', 'don't' with 'do not'), and be more mindful of word choice and sentence structure to maintain a consistently formal tone throughout the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

224 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Some think that all entertaining TV programmes should educate people about the importance of social issues. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Today, modern man is striving hard to maintain himself in the midst of plethora of evil practices in the society. his physical and mental strenghts are touching detrimental lows in the wake of social curses prevalent around him and talking of social issues, it has become quite a problem in the ,modern time. At the same time TV is main source the entainment so education via TV can play vital role in the betterment of society but I am not in favour of the given context is all TV programmes should educate people.
4.5
band
some people get into debt by buying things they don't. need and can't afford. what are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?
The behaviors of individuals in accumulating debt for buying things they do not need is a concerning financial problems that arise from poor financial management. This phenomenon is often observed in urban areas. In urban areas, the intense marketing strategy and the desire to prove their social class drive individuals to make an impulsive purchase. The limited financial ability to fulfill all material possessions leads individuals to take loans for buying things they cannot afford. If this behavior persists, without realizing it, the amount of debt will significantly increase. For example, in Jakarta, more than 50% of young people in the productive age are trapped in online loans with a higher interest rate. The pressure from society for young individuals to own the newest gadget, hangout in fancy restaurants, or own branded items as a status symbol will force them to take online loans with easier access and requirements. However, the high interest rates which range about 5% per da...
5.5
band
Some governments spend a lot of public money training individuals to be successful in international sporting events. Some people believe that this money should be spent on things that will benefit the general public instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree
Sports has been a part of our society for many years. Nowadays, governments allocate training funds for eligible individuals to participate in international sporting events, such as the Olympics or the Southeast Asean Games. While some people would say that the money should instead be allocated to the needs of the general public, I believe that it is important for the government to support the training of its athletes. This will not only boost the confidence of these professionals but it will also help in achieving their goal, and that is to win a gold for their country.
5.5
band
Walking is known to be beneficial for health yet fewer and fewer people are walking these days. What are the reason for this? What can be done to tackle this problem?
Whilst the advantages of jogging on a daily basis are extensively known by many, nevertheless the number of people who uphold walking is decreasing due to the shrinkage of trails in cities and the effects of digitalization. It is my firm belief that by encouraging city executive powers to establish more recreational areas for people to jog as well as educating people about the health benefits of walking outside.
6
band
Some believe that students should begin learning a language very early in school while others think these subjects should be taught later. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
There is an opinion that children should start learning foreign languages at a young age, while others believe that people should study it later in life. Some people claim that studying new material is easier in childhood, when the brain just starting to form a neural network, therefore, they think that children would catch languages faster. However, that statement is not scientifically proven, so people assume that it is easier to learn a new language in an older age when an individual already has experience. In my opinion, adults can faster learn a language because of a longer attention span, experience and clear motivation.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Some think that all entertaining TV programmes should educate people about the importance of social issues. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people get into debt by buying things they don't. need and can't afford. what are the reasons for this behaviour? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

Some governments spend a lot of public money training individuals to be successful in international sporting events. Some people believe that this money should be spent on things that will benefit the general public instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Walking is known to be beneficial for health yet fewer and fewer people are walking these days. What are the reason for this? What can be done to tackle this problem?

Some believe that students should begin learning a language very early in school while others think these subjects should be taught later. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.