In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
Children
are able to get everything whether they do their Use synonyms
upmost
- It is told in several societies. Though Correct your spelling
utmost
this
can motivate Linking Words
children
to Use synonyms
conquere
different ups and downs of their lives, there are Correct your spelling
conquer
also
some negative effects of Linking Words
this
kind of motivation.
On the one hand, Linking Words
children
often feel downhearted in different situations. It is a must for the senior members of a society to push them to Use synonyms
acheive
their goals. Correct your spelling
achieve
Besides
, there are not only physical fitness but Linking Words
also
mental strength Linking Words
are
needed to Correct subject-verb agreement
is
work
towards life goals. Use synonyms
Additionally
, sometimes Linking Words
children
are blissfully Use synonyms
unware
Correct your spelling
unaware
about
their potential powers. Change preposition
of
Then
, they feel depressed whether they fail to reach their ambitions. Here, Linking Words
Linking Words
this kind
of inspirational words can make them Fix the agreement mistake
these kinds
work
harder and hard Use synonyms
work
mostly never ends in Use synonyms
a
unexpected result. It tends to ensure that Change the article
an
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
what
people want.
Add a missing verb
are what
On the other hand
, the competency and mental strength of all the Linking Words
children
could not be equal. There might be some physical or mental obstacles to Use synonyms
Use synonyms
work in
a full pace. Wrong verb form
working
Then
, the assurance of anything by trying hard could not be true. Linking Words
Children
who have been suffering Use synonyms
in
attention deficiencies Change preposition
from
have
not enough power to aim Add a missing verb
do have
something
strongly. They might not Change preposition
for something
acheive
everything Correct your spelling
achieve
and
that Correct word choice
but
do
not refer to Change the verb form
does
the
lack of trying. Correct article usage
a
Furthermore
, in Linking Words
this
era of technology, there are a huge number of factors Linking Words
beside
trying to achieve something. Change preposition
besides
For instance
, the poor boys Linking Words
go
to the nearest school in a Correct pronoun usage
who go
third world
country might be unable to get awards in a science olympiad. They have potential but they Add a hyphen
third-world
have
not enough equipment. So, the advice to Add a missing verb
do have
work
harder to achieve Use synonyms
award
or something might not be useful for them. Add an article
an award
Furthermore
, Linking Words
this
kind of motivation often Linking Words
create
the mentality of Change the verb form
creates
competetion
Correct your spelling
competition
instead
of help. Linking Words
This
will be harmful Linking Words
for
Change the preposition
to
a
society in Correct article usage
apply
a
long run.
In conclusion, it can be Correct article usage
the
told
thatVerb problem
said
,
Remove the comma
apply
this
message has both advantages and disadvantages. If Linking Words
the
society is able to deliver Correct article usage
apply
this
message in Linking Words
a
right way that will be helpful for Correct article usage
the
children
. Use synonyms
Otherwise
, Linking Words
this
message will cause physical and mental issues to Linking Words
children
in Use synonyms
differet
aspects.Correct your spelling
different
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coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, ensure that ideas are not only listed but also logically connected to one another. Work on using a wider range of linking words and phrases to create a smooth flow between sentences and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Develop your introduction and conclusion more fully. They should clearly state the topic and the writer's viewpoint in the introduction, and effectively summarize the main points and restate the opinion in the conclusion, without adding new information.
task achievement
To enhance task achievement, ensure that all parts of the prompt are addressed with balanced treatment of the advantages and disadvantages. Expand on ideas with more detail, and include specific, relevant examples that illustrate the points being made.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example