The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in there different countries.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in there different countries.
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The line chart compares the percentage of elderly citizens community who are over 64
years
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of age in the
USA
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,
Sweden
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,
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Japan
Correct word choice
and Japan
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over a century.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Japan
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will have experienced a significant rise by the end of
period
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the period
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shown. The
USA
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and
Sweden
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are increasing steadily in the number of over 64
years
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old residents. as can be seen, in 1940 the population aged 65
years
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and over in
Japan
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formed solely 5% of
total
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the total
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population,
while
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in The
USA
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they are responsible for almost 9% of citizens and
Sweden
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accounted for approximately 7% of
population
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the population
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. In 1940
Japan
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started to see a steep fall to 3%
untill
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until
about 1960
then
Linking Words
it stayed fixed,
while
Linking Words
the two other countries were rising.
Also
Linking Words
evident is, in 2030
Japan
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will start to rise sharply and
in
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apply
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a few
years
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later it will overtake others to reach
the
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a
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peak of almost 27% in 2040.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Just before 2000, The
USA
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and
Sweden
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were equal in
persentage
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percentage
of old people at about 15% and they are expected to soar to about 22.5% and 25% respectively.
Submitted by shamim1999 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words years, usa, sweden, japan with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • aged 65 and over
  • depicted
  • population
  • changes
  • span of 100 years
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