Some think that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together. Others, however, think that hosting the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The issue of the Olympic
games
nowadays
receives
Verb problem
is
show examples
extremely
debate
Replace the word
debated
show examples
topic. Society claims these professional sports can associate people with different
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
being together
while
others think being host venue will spend
much
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
money
which could be used
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
essential
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
. I am going to focus on
argument
Fix the agreement mistake
arguments
show examples
in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
of
this
before moving to look at those
against
Correct pronoun usage
against it
show examples
. In my
firm
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
opinion, I believe Olympic funding is beneficial to help citizens build international connections.
To begin
, many people consider still there
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
vital issues
should
Correct pronoun usage
that should
show examples
be done rather than using
money
Add an article
the money
show examples
for the Olympic
games
. Inequality of development city
being
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
main
Add an article
the main
show examples
concern of
these issue
Change the determiner
this issue
these issues
show examples
. The
money
is used to address the urgency of the population's welfare,
for
example
Add the comma(s)
example,
show examples
adequate health facilities. In developing
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
with low
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
of
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
, society difficult to reach it.
On the other hand
, there are two reasons why
athlete
Correct article usage
an athlete
show examples
championship is important those are
event
Fix the agreement mistake
events
show examples
to make
opportunity
Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
show examples
to develop
overseas
Correct article usage
an overseas
show examples
network and introduce the place
Rephrase
where that
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
event be held. World
wide
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
tournament is attended much
citizenship
Replace the word
citizens
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
have diverse
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
with their uniqueness.
For instance
,
country
Correct article usage
a country
show examples
has
Correct pronoun usage
that has
show examples
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
show examples
technology will share
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
region
Add an article
the region
a region
show examples
that has rich oil resource and
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have
possibility
Correct article usage
the possibility
show examples
to collaborate.
Moreover
, the place where the
games
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
used will definitely be a topic of conversation and appear in
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
or television which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
it famous.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, hosting professional
championship
Fix the agreement mistake
championships
show examples
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
sponsors with fantastic amounts because it is
prestigious
Add an article
a prestigious
show examples
event. Large
companies
Add a verb
companies are
companies were
show examples
willing to encourage
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
games
because some of them love to watch a great tournament and
also
it can increase their popularity. In conclusion,
although
there some issues can be
done
Verb problem
resolved
show examples
with
money
,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it can not reason that
Olypic
Correct your spelling
Olympic
games
is
Verb problem
should
show examples
not be held
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Coherence & Cohesion
Consider organizing your essay into clear, separated paragraphs, each with a single focused idea that relates to the overall thesis. This aids logical structure.
Coherence & Cohesion
In your introduction, clearly state both sides of the argument as well as your thesis. This sets clear expectations for the reader about your essay structure and ensures the introduction and conclusion are present.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop each point with specific, relevant examples and explanations. This strengthens your main points and makes them more convincing.
Task Achievement
Ensure you directly address the prompt by discussing both views and providing a clear, nuanced opinion. Expand on each viewpoint before presenting your own stance to ensure you meet the task achievement criterion.
Task Achievement
Focus on providing a balanced discussion. Spend equal amounts of the essay on each point of view and make clear separations between your opinion and the discussion of each side of the argument.
Task Achievement
Incorporate specific examples and data to support your arguments. This not only strengthens your position but also shows a more comprehensive understanding of the topic, aiding in task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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