Some people belive that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinión

#people #belive #situation #job #shortage #money #situations #opinión

According to

some

people

, we should accept unacceptable situations like an unsatisfactory profession or scarcity of money.

However

, others believe that,

instead

we should try to improve those situations. I personally believe that

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apply

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surviving in an unacceptable situation should not be accepted rather trying to improve it would be beneficial.

People

have to continue a

job

they are not satisfied with because

Add the comma(s)

, in

show examples

the competitive

job

market, it is sometimes not easy to secure a

job

. Even more importantly, finding a

job

which would provide them satisfaction

as well as

earnings is sometimes quite impossible.

Consequently

, some

people

believe that

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apply

show examples

it is better to move on with

Change the article

show examples

unsatisfactory

job

with

low

Add an article

a low

the low

show examples

amount of money.

For instance

, around 60% of the young generation in India are continuing a

job

which they are unsatisfied with. They are bound to adhere to that unsatisfactory profession because they do not have other alternative ways of earning. Unacceptable and unpleasant jobs generally cause physical and mental stress among professionals. If someone is compelled to attend the same

job

which he or she does not like may result in continuous dissatisfaction followed by low performance. A survey based in the UK

for example

, illustrates that the production rate can be plummeted to 40% only because of

job

dissatisfaction.

Therefore

, it is better to change the

job

and look for another new one. I personally believe that

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it is better to quit a

job

which we do not enjoy. Because it not only affects our productivity but

also

our physical and mental health.

To conclude

, unsatisfactory

job

consequences damage performance

although

it is the only means of earnings to a significant amount of

people

in the world. Government should increase the variety of employment opportunities

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apply

show examples

so that

people

would not no longer bear the dissatisfaction of jobs.

Submitted by rahman_rehana on Tue Jan 30 2024

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Task Achievement

To enhance task achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. Expand on each point of view talked about and provide more depth in your own opinion as well as in your conclusion.

Coherence & Cohesion

Improve coherence and cohesion by ensuring that ideas flow logically from one to another. Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and between paragraphs more effectively.

Coherence & Cohesion

Support your main points with more detailed and relevant examples. Develop your arguments further to provide a richer context and insight into the issue discussed.

Coherence & Cohesion

Be sure to provide an introduction that clearly states the topic and a conclusion that summarises the main points and restates your position. Both should encapsulate the essence of the essay effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

301 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

acceptance
contentment
resilience
complacency
personal growth
societal progress
motivating
circumstances
growth mindset
innovation
persistent
frustration
dissatisfaction
realistic expectations

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Some people belive that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinión

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people say that the Internet is responsible for destroying social skills of teenagers and young adults. What impact does the internet have on the social skills of teenagers and young adults and what can be done to make sure that it does not harm their social development?

Some students nowadays prefer to study online through online courses. What are the advantages and disadvantages of learning online?

A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweight its drawbacks?

Some people believe that to give opportunities to the new generation companies should encourage high level employees who are older than 55 to retire. Do you agree or disagree?