Not the best people, it very hard good – without caught, potential to commit – Break the law, but ethical judgement wrong. Ex. Some people sentence into prison punishment because breaking law but protecting family relatives. They might convey negative message, protection outweigh the punishment, mitigating danger
In
modern
educational sector, the topic Add an article
the modern
centering
around whether Change the spelling
centring
criminals
, who have become legal citizens, are the right people
educating
adolescents away from committing a Change the verb form
to educate
crime
has sparked considerable debate. I partially agree with the proposal, considering some criminals
are not the best educators for teenagers
.
In my opinion, allowing those criminals
talking
to Change the verb form
to talk
teenagers
are hazardous initiative since it is very hard to say whether they can make good ethical judgement
and distinguish right from wrong. Without testing their ethical standards, the only standard to evaluate those Replace the word
judgments
criminals
is that they have not committed to
a Change preposition
apply
crime
for a long period. For example
, some people
might commit a crime
again under extremely emotional circumstances. In China, many people
hurt others for protecting their family members. In this
particular case, they might convey misleading messages to juvenile
to make Fix the agreement mistake
juveniles
right
ethical judgements.
Correct article usage
the right
However
, I can understand some people
contend that criminals
are good educators for teenagers
. Those criminals
are the
good examples Correct article usage
apply
convincing
Change preposition
of convincing
teenagers
the
negative Change preposition
of the
consequence
of committing a Fix the agreement mistake
consequences
crime
by talking about their harsh living standard
and isolated mindsets in prison. Some particular Fix the agreement mistake
standards
criminals
might be more persuasively
. Change the word
persuasive
For example
, Chris Wu, a famous Chinese actor and
Correct word choice
who
draw
millions of juvenile fans, has been sentenced to prison because of harassing an under-18 girl. The words about the danger of punishments from Correct subject-verb agreement
draws
such
celebrity
might exert more deterring effects Fix the agreement mistake
celebrities
those
juvenile fans.
In conclusion, I agree that Change preposition
on those
teenagers
can be educated by some criminals
, but not all of them, about the danger of committing a crime
.Submitted by erminelyu on
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task achievement
Ensure that the introduction clearly states your position and that it is consistently reflected throughout the essay.
task achievement
Develop your arguments further by providing more detailed and specific examples that are directly relevant to the topic.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a logical flow of ideas by arranging them in a clear paragraph structure, with each paragraph focusing on a single main idea.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices and transition words to link ideas together more effectively.
task achievement
Clarify and explain your main points in greater detail to ensure that your argument is convincing and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Check for grammatical errors and work on sentence structure to improve readability and clarity.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...