Young people who commit serious crimes, such as robbery or violent attacks should be punished in the same way as adults. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The level of punishment that criminals receive should be determined carefully to reduce the crime rates. Whether young
offenders
should be punished in the same way as Use synonyms
adults
is often a contentious issue. I generally agree that the punishments should differ Use synonyms
according to
the stage of the development of each criminal to provide effective treatment.
On one hand, there should be no disparity in the punishment among Linking Words
offenders
because they are equally responsible for their own wrongdoings. Use synonyms
In other words
, the troubles that victims get do not make any difference when they are caused by young suspects. Linking Words
For example
, families of the loss experience the same sense of suffering when their parents and children are killed by the young. It is not likely that they are convinced by their reduced sentences and financial charges just because the offender is immature. Linking Words
Furthermore
, they must be deeply disappointed by the results and lose hope for fear of similar crimes being Linking Words
repetitive
among young Replace the word
repeated
offenders
. Use synonyms
Offenders
will not be encouraged to refrain from violent acts because of their understanding of mitigated penalties. Use synonyms
Therefore
, the same punishment should be imposed on young criminals as Linking Words
adults
to discourage their illegal acts.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, the Linking Words
authority
should take the immaturity of the young into serious account. Children are not fully developed and lack a significant understanding of Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
moralities
. Their inability to regulate their emotion and express their opinions cannot be equally blamed on grown-ups. Fix the agreement mistake
morality
Consequently
, the harsh penalty would not encourage them to reflect on their bad behaviour and feel sorry for the victims. Rather than the strict regulations from the police and court, education is of fundamental importance to raise a sense of respect and love to prevent their selfish acts. Linking Words
Therefore
, the equal treatment of young criminals as old ones would not be effective in discouraging their wrongdoings.
In conclusion, victims demand as harsh penalties as Linking Words
adults
as young Use synonyms
adults
because the difference in age would not reduce their shock at all. Use synonyms
However
, one cannot expect positive consequences since education and emotional support are what they need the most to alter their behaviour.Linking Words
Submitted by mizuho on
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introduction conclusion present
The essay presents a recognizable introduction and conclusion, which is good. However, the introduction could be further enhanced by more explicitly stating your position on the topic. Similarly, the conclusion should concisely summarize the main points discussed and reaffirm your stance.
logical structure
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supported main points
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complete response
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clear comprehensive ideas
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relevant specific examples
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example