IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #ten #countries #production #consumption #electricity #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar chart illustrates the information about how the households spent their weekly salary in 1968 and
in
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apply
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2018 respectively.
Overall
Linking Words
, in 1968,
Food
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 was an important
prioritiy
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priority
 for most families, housing, clothing and
footware
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footwear
 were the second choices for formal
people
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.
However
Linking Words
, leisure
were
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was
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 become the most essential
activities
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activity
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 for the communities in 2018,
food
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 got a
sginificant
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significant
 decline after 50 years. Look at the black bar, the family
lived
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who lived
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 in 2018 contributed 35% of their income on
food
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,
15
Correct word choice
and 15
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%
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 comprised
by
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of
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 housing rent and
cllthing
Correct your spelling
clothing
 respectively. Eventually,
people
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 were unwilling to pay their money on fuel and power which was slightly over 5%. In 2018, these
people
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 started changing their spending habits from
food
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 to leisure which is around 22%,
food
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were
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was
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 not
very
Rephrase
as
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 important as
people
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though
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thought
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 which is
approximatly
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approximately
 18%, in that generation, housing
obtain
Verb problem
apply
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a huge improvement and even
over
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apply
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the expenses of
food
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,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
located at around 28%.
Submitted by binyang212 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words food, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • disparity
  • significant
  • top ten countries
  • main features
  • compare
  • relevant
  • geographical concentration
  • trends
  • patterns
  • implications
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