The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

#process #sugar #cane

The

ilustration

Correct your spelling

illustration

given shows the manufacturing

process

from

sugar

cane

sugar

Overall

, it is explicit that there are seven stages in the manufacturing

process

. It starts with growing

sugar

cane

and ends with drying and cooling.

Firstly

sugar

cane

may grow up to 12 to 18 months before the harvest season. When it's already ripe, harvesting

done

Add a missing verb

is done

show examples

through two different

method

Change to a plural noun

methods

show examples

which may done by machine or manually

harvested

Verb problem

apply

show examples

Then

, the production

process

ends with crushing

sugar

cane

to extract its juice.

Furthermore

, the juice will be

transfer

Wrong verb form

transferred

show examples

limestone

Correct article usage

a limestone

show examples

filter to enter the purifying

process

Next,

the juice enters the evaporator to create syrup out of it. In order to obtain

sugar

crystal

Fix the agreement mistake

crystals

show examples

from the syrup

then

it needs

Correct article usage

a centifuge

show examples

centifuge

Correct your spelling

centrifuge

process

. The cycle of manufacturing

sugar

then

ends with drying and cooling the

sugar

crystal.

Submitted by zefanyagyu on Wed Jan 31 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar, cane with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

137 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Some people think that children should only read academic books. Others believe that reading books for pleasure is equally important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes for example working for a charity, improving the neighborhood or teaching sprots to younger children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people buy products that they do not really need and replace old products with new ones unnecessarily. Why do people buy things they do not really need? Do you think this is a good thing?

Some people think that the most important function of music is to help people relax. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (CO2) emissions per person in the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal between 1967 and 2007. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.