In modern society, fashion is becoming more and more popular in people’s choice of clothes. Why? Do you think it is positive development or negative development?

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In
this
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modern era, the
fashion
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industry has been revolutionising as compared to the past.
In these
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These
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days,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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fashion
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is quite renowned
also
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the individual's preference
due to
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the
advert
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adverts
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and technology. I think it is a positive development and
this
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essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.
To begin
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with,
people
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have more
fashion
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sense through watching advertisements.
Everyday
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Every day
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new
fashion
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dresses
Use synonyms
are introduced by the
fashion
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designers that humankind like to buy and wear new trendy
cloths
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clothes
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like their favourite actors and actresses.
For example
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, numerous
fashion
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shops introduced
by
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apply
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their new designs through
fashion
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shows and when famous
person
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people
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wear
that
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them
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. Needless to say, mankind likes to wear updated new
dresses
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in order to they have to enhance their beauty and
confident
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confidence
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by
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with
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this
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kind of
cloth
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clothing
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.
Moreover
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,
fashion
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trendy
dresses
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bring more benefits to the government like taxes. These days
prople's
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people's
consumerism
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has increase
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increase
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increased
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, so they purchase frequently clothes even if not
any
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on any
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special occasions, and
as a result
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,
garments
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garment
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owners get more profits and they would pay more taxes amount interns
of
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on
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how much amounts they earn from
this
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.
For instance
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, Indian
fashion
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designers
were
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apply
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opened
small
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a small
the small
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and big
boutique
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boutiques
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, so
people
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have a chance to wear new trendy
dresses
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with
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at
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a reasonable prices
Correct the article-noun agreement
reasonable prices
a reasonable price
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like
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as
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famous and rich
people
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wear.
Besides
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, technology
also
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assistes
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assists
assisted
to
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in
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being
the
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a
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fashion
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sense
to
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in
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people
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.
Hence
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, indeed it is a positive development.
To conclude
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,
fashion
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is famous around the world and
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the human's
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human's
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human
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sense of
fashion
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also
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increased
due to
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advertisements and technology
along with
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it
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apply
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increases
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in peoples'
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peoples'
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people's
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consumerism.
Therefore
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, I think it is a positive development because
of
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apply
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the government get more taxes from the garment owners and it brings more confidence to the individuals.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that you address all parts of the task directly. Your essay should include not only the reasons why fashion has become popular but also explicitly discuss whether this is a positive or negative development, with balanced arguments for both where appropriate.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your ideas clearly and logically. Use paragraphs effectively to separate different ideas and arguments. Make sure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that this idea is expanded upon with relevant details.
Task Achievement
Provide clear and relevant examples to support your points. Instead of providing general or hypothetical examples, give specific instances demonstrating the trends you discuss.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on developing coherence within and between paragraphs. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within sentences and across paragraphs to guide the reader through your argument.
Task Achievement
Refine the clarity of your ideas by expanding on how fashion affects individuals and society, ensuring that you always link back to the question. This can be achieved by discussing both sides of the development and drawing a more nuanced conclusion.
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