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Writing Samples
Band 3

These days, it is pervasive to have people from two different generations mix in ‎the same workplace. Are there more advantages or disadvantages to this ‎situation? Give your own opinion and include relevant examples.‎

#people #two #generations #mix #‎the #workplace #‎situation
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The impact of the advantages of two different generations mix in the same workplace will provide many benefits where the older
generation
 can share their work
experience
 that the younger
generation
 has never been able to get,
this
 will certainly have a positive impact on the job itself Currently, the younger
generation
 should indeed gain a lot of
experience
 from the older
generation
 so that the younger
generation
 can gain
experience
 from others, resulting in more productive work.
On the other hand
, the disadvantage of the combination of these two generations is that the older
generation
 finds it difficult to accept the changes that have occurred,
coupled with
 the current technological developments The older
generation
 will have difficulty adapting to the progress
that is
 happening because they feel that their
experience
 is more meaningful than the technology itself The presence of the older
generation
 who find it difficult to accept advice from the younger
generation
 will hinder working in groups because the older
generation
 considers themselves to be more knowledgeable about the work being done
Submitted by talubis on

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structural
Ensure that an essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion structure. The introduction should present the topic and your thesis, the body should contain well-developed paragraphs with clear main ideas and support, and the conclusion should summarize the main points and restate your opinion.
development
Develop your main points more thoroughly by expanding on each idea with clear examples and explanations. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea, and the connection between these ideas needs to be clearer.
cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices (such as conjunctions, pronouns, and linking words) and paragraphing to help the reader follow the argument and to highlight the relationship between ideas.
task response
Be sure to respond to all parts of the task. This includes making your position clear throughout the essay and providing a balanced discussion of both advantages and disadvantages if the question requires it.
examples
Include specific examples to support your points. They can be drawn from your own experience, the wider world, or hypothetical situations. Specific examples make your argument more persuasive and your essay more engaging to read.
language
Work on using a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to express your ideas more clearly and precisely. This will make your writing more engaging and coherent.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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