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Band 1.5

The three pictures show the position of vocalno, and a village before and after volcanic eruption.

#three #pictures #show #position #vocalno #village #eruption
The three photos represent changes in a village before and after volcanic
eruption
Fix the agreement mistake
eruptions
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. In general, the huge variations made to the land are the considerable number of houses
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and its distribution. The second picture presents the houses
setup
Correct your spelling
set up
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 in a town. Excluding the two neighbourhoods,
ones
Fix the agreement mistake
one
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 in the western part and another in the east which was farther from the volcano, but it had already changed. There was a vast of families that had left their town after a volcanic eruption.
Hence
, only half of the previous number of
residence
Replace the word
residents
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 still resided there.
In addition
, the biological ecosystems
was
Change the verb form
were
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 different
by
Change preposition
because of
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 the steep descent of the palm trees and
also
 the disappearance of the west pond. A
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
notable
 change was the area that was affected by the lava. For over
a
Correct article usage
apply
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half of the land was burned to the west.
This
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
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to
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
an
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 uninhabitable zone.
Submitted by Alexandre Harvey on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should paraphrase the task and outline the main points. The conclusion should summarize the key comparisons without introducing new information.
Coherence and Cohesion
Develop your main points fully. Each paragraph should focus on a different aspect of the changes undergone by the village, with clear topic sentences to guide the reader.
Task Achievement
Make sure to directly compare the before and after situations of the village, using comparative language and structures to clarify the degree of change.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a wider range of vocabulary to accurately describe the differences and changes. Aim for precision in language to enhance the descriptive quality of your essay.
Task Achievement
Organize your essay so that each main point is developed with specific examples and clear explanations. Avoid vague statements by providing concrete details.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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