The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement- making process , and how cement us used to produce concrete for building purposes.

The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement- making process , and how cement us used to produce concrete for building purposes.
The diagrams illustrate the stages and equipment used in
cement
production
and concrete
production
. I will explain
this
production
process in the following paragraphs in detail.
Overall
, the manufacturing of
cement
consists of various tools
such
as a mixer, rotating heater, crusher and grinder
whereas
four materials are used for concrete
production
. To start, in
cement
production
Add a comma
production,
show examples
the process starts with limestone and clay
begin
Verb problem
being
show examples
crushed and transformed into powder and later it passes to a rotating heater through a mixer.
Powder
Add an article
The powder
show examples
is mixed and heated,
then
a grinder is used to make
cement
from the heated powder. Those
cement
powders are packed in bags for future use. Next is concrete manufacturing , in concrete manufacture different materials are used to produce
cement
, including
cement
15%, 25% of sand ,50% of gravel which is small stones and 10% of water are put into the concrete mixer and
then
it
finally
produced end product which is concrete.
Submitted by insighttribez on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words cement, production with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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