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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The graph below shows the percentage of households with different kinds of technology in the UK from 1997 to 2001.

The graph below shows the percentage of households with different kinds of technology in the UK from 1997 to 2001.
#percentage #households #kinds #technology #uk
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Remarkable information is provided regarding the rate of using several technologies in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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, over a 5-year interval, commencing in 1997 and
culminationg
Correct your spelling
culminating
 in 2001. From an
overall
Linking Words
perspective
Add a comma
perspective,
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 it can
be observe
Change the verb form
be observed
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 that the among of
using
Verb problem
apply
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all
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
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 of discussed technologies has increased
during
Change preposition
over
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years
Correct article usage
the years
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. By a closer examination,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 by ignoring little
flactuations
Correct your spelling
fluctuations
fluctuation
,
CD
Correct article usage
the CD
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player
Use synonyms
 and computer both experienced linear increases. In 1997, CD
Use synonyms
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
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 and
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
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 stood at 60 and 40
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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, respectively. They both grow about 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. Turning to the telephone
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
Internet and DVD
Use synonyms
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
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, they all have similar trends
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which they exceed by an increasing slope. In 1997,
telephone
Add an article
the telephone
a telephone
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 was at 20%
while
Linking Words
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
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 was
as
Change preposition
at
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 half of it.
This
Linking Words
 10
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 difference remained during the period which
in
Correct your spelling
is
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 1999 the usage of
DVD
Add an article
the DVD
show examples
Use synonyms
player
Fix the agreement mistake
players
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 was
Submitted by ashkanmlk80 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words player with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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