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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The three pie charts below show the changes in annual spending by a particular UK school in 1981, 1991, and 2001. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The three pie charts below show the changes in annual spending by a particular UK school in 1981, 1991, and 2001. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie charts demonstrate the changes in yearly spending by a particular school in
United
Correct article usage
the United
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 Kingdom in 1981, 1991 and 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
, what stands out from the charts is that the spending on Insurance and
Furniture
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 and
equipment
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was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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experienced a growth. Looking at the details, as regards 1981,
Teacheres'
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teachers'
salaries
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 had the highest percentage, at %40, which was much more than Other
wokers'
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workers'
salaries
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, at %28. Resources e.g. books and
Furniture
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 and
equipment
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 were the same, at %15. The Insurance was the least important one, at %2. Regarding 1991, Teachers
salaries
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 were increased significantly to %50. The Other workers'
salaries
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 were in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
second place, at %22, which was slightly more than Resources e.g. books, at %20. The
Furniture
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 and
equipment
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was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 a
litte
Correct your spelling
little
 more
imprtant
Correct your spelling
important
 than Insurance, at %5 and %3 in turn. Looking at 2001, Teachers'
salaries
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 were in the first place, at 45 per cent.
Furniture
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 and
equipment
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 were the second most
spended
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spent
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 items, which were considerably more than Other workers'
salaries
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, at %15. Resources were a little higher than
Insurances
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Insurance
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, at %9 and %8 respectively.

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words furniture, equipment, salaries with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • spending distribution
  • annual expenditures
  • budget allocation
  • highest expenditures
  • fluctuations
  • budget priorities
  • reduced spending
  • increased spending
  • emphasis
  • significant changes
  • consistent emphasis
  • rising costs
  • noteworthy shifts
  • spending patterns
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