• Describe what the problem with the changing rooms is • Say what happened the last times you complained • Explain what you want the manager to do.

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Dear Gulchehra A
sports
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competition was held at our school, and our
team
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won it.
Then
Linking Words
he gave a guide to our
team
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, which
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
to go to the next competition. We all gathered strength and went to the
sports
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Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
. After we arrived, we prepared with our
team
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. After our training, we went to the dressing
room
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.
However
Linking Words
, there are many problems in the dressing
room
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,
that is
Linking Words
, there is no wardrobe, the door is broken,
half
Correct word choice
and half
show examples
of the window is missing. We struggled a lot with our
team
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. But we moved quickly to get out of there. After that, we all went to the head of the
sports
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Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
, Gulchehra Ergasheva, to complain. We explained the problem to the best of our ability and promised to solve it. But it was not resolved. It was the same again when we went to the dressing
room
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. I got angry,
then
Linking Words
I decided to go to the leader myself and went. But they did not open the door, they did not even want to hear. After that,
together with
Linking Words
our
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team
Add a comma
team,
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we promised to leave the
sports
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Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
and never return. We only ask the manager to repair the dressing
room
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in the
sports
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
. Yours sincerely Mokhinur
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Task response
To improve task response, ensure your essay directly addresses each point of the given prompt clearly. Structure the essay to have a distinct introduction, body, and conclusion, describing the problem, past complaints, and desired action.
Coherence and cohesion
Develop coherence by ordering your ideas logically. Use connectors to show relationships between ideas, and make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by relevant details.
Coherence and cohesion
For cohesion, work on using cohesive devices (like conjunctions, pronouns, and linking words) to help the reader understand the connection between your ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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