IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The two tables below show statistics of workers of foreign and US birth in the United States last year.

The two tables below show statistics of workers of foreign and US birth in the United States last year.
The given tables compare statistics of
workers
Use synonyms
 of foreign and US birth in the United States
last
Linking Words
 year.
Overall
Linking Words
,
workers
Use synonyms
total
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in
workforce
Add an article
a workforce
the workforce
show examples
that
Change preposition
in that
show examples
 native country is US was higher than the number of foreign births.
Also
Linking Words
, both of them have the largest number of male
workers
Use synonyms
 than female
workers
Use synonyms
 in different rankings. The table data clearly shows that nonnative laborers in the
age
Use synonyms
 of 35-44
more
Add a missing verb
are more
show examples
 unemployed (619) compared to those aged 16-24 (314).
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many people
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
by
Change preposition
aged
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 16-24
not
Add a missing verb
are not
show examples
 provided with
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 like other ages.
In addition
Linking Words
,
rate
Correct article usage
the rate
show examples
 of employed of foreign birth in
35
Correct article usage
the 35
show examples
-44
age
Use synonyms
 presents numerous
figure
Fix the agreement mistake
figures
show examples
 - 6,265, than other ages.
However
Linking Words
, employees of US birth
still
Add a missing verb
are still
show examples
 dominant with 28,019 in the
age
Use synonyms
 of 45-54.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
total
Correct article usage
the total
show examples
 by gender in
workforce
Add an article
the workforce
a workforce
show examples
 of nonresidents was lower than that of US-born
workers
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, in
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 one – 24,357,
in
Correct word choice
and in
show examples
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
 – 129,533.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 82%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words workers, age with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "tables" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "compare" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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