It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

There are a lot of debates regarding whether
people
should stay in their comfort zones or are
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
supposed to try something new even with some risks in it. There are many
benefits
of
attempts
Wrong verb form
attempting
show examples
new
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
.
However
, do the advantages
are outweigh
Change the verb form
outweigh
show examples
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
will be discussed in
this
essay.  On the one hand,
people
would not be able to determine what is the
benefits
of something without actually
try
Change the form of the verb
trying
show examples
it.
Therefore
, it is crucial to have the courage
of trying
Change preposition
to try
show examples
new
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
because it will lead to
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
benefits
that we do not know
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
exists
Correct subject-verb agreement
exist
show examples
.
For example
, you can not understand the happiness that
come
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comes
show examples
from teaching others without attempts to teach someone. Because of that,
people
should embrace
theirself
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
and delicately
trying
Wrong verb form
try
show examples
to pursue something new.
On the other hand
, sometimes, new
things
come up with a risk on it.
Nevertheless
, we can manage the consequences of
such
things
with
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by
show examples
being careful in every
decisions
Change to a singular noun
decision
show examples
we take.
For instance
, you should carefully decide what kind of shoes you should wear for a ski that will guarantee your safety.
This
way, even if you are a first-timer, you can lower the possibility of falling down.
Hence
, the disadvantages of trying new
things
are worth it compared to the
benefits
. In conclusion, considering that trying something new will give a feelings you never feel before, the
benefits
of taking risks
are outweigh
Change the verb form
outweigh
show examples
the consequences.
However
, we should be careful and
thoroughly
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thorough
show examples
when
decides
Wrong verb form
deciding
show examples
to try new
things
. The risks can not stop
people
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
trying new opportunities.
Submitted by farrandyerza on

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task achievement
Be sure to have a clear thesis statement in your introduction that directly addresses the prompt.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your ideas into clear paragraphs with topic sentences that outline the main idea of each paragraph.
task achievement
Support your ideas with specific examples or evidence to strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Work on ensuring a clear logical progression in your essay by using connectors and transition words appropriately.
language proficiency
Be mindful of grammatical errors and aim to use a range of grammatical structures correctly.
task achievement
Ensure that your conclusion restates your main points and clearly answers the prompt.
task achievement
Refrain from too many general statements; aim for depth rather than breadth in your development of ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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