Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects, other people think that in today's word, subjects like science and technology are more important than history Discuss both views and give your opinion

Several
people
believe that studying
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
history
's subject is one of the most necessary things.
Whereas
, others
considere
Correct your spelling
consider
considered
that science and
technology
are more imperative to be learned than
history
. In
this
essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument
as well as
my perspective on the below paragraph. On the first hand, studying
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
history
is to understand
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
root of identity.
History
elaborates a tradition, language and norm that form
people
now.
In addition
, a minority of
people
can learn about past mistakes. Everyone understanding satisfactory and abdominal
occurrances
Correct your spelling
occurrences
occurrence
in the past can learn some
guilts
Correct subject-verb agreement
guilt
show examples
, and it prevents that incident repeated in the next.
For instance
, there
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
war is able to be studied about the effects
that
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
caused.
Thus
, they are going to avoid a war, and they will keep
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
peace.
On the other hand
, learning the subjects of science and
technology
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
entailed in advancements of globalization. Nowadays,
development
Correct article usage
the development
show examples
of
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
is
rapidly
Replace the adverb
rapid
show examples
because there is
technology
Add an article
a technology
the technology
show examples
that is
able to make it easier
humans
Change preposition
for humans
show examples
to do activities. Transportation and communication,
for example
, are the most developed
technology
.
There
Replace the word
Their
show examples
transportations
such
as
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
,
train
Fix the agreement mistake
trains
show examples
and
airplane
Fix the agreement mistake
airplanes
show examples
make it easy
people
Change preposition
for people
show examples
to move
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
other places without spending a lot of time.
Besides
,
technology
communication affords many
informations
Correct your spelling
information
so that a majority of
people
is
Verb problem
can
show examples
easy
Replace the word
easily
show examples
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
obtain some knowledge, and
this
makes it easier
someone
Change preposition
for someone
show examples
to communicate with another person without talking face-to-face.
To sum up
, both arguments carry strength and significance, and neither can be refuted outright.
Nevertheless
, I personally subscribe to the fact that combining those subjects is important, and students should be able to be equal to study those materials.
Submitted by fifi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea that is developed and expanded upon.
development
Focus on developing your ideas fully with clear explanations and relevant examples. Make sure each paragraph relates to the main topic of the essay and contributes to your argument.
language
Check for grammatical accuracy and range of vocabulary. Using varied sentence structures and precise vocabulary can help convey ideas more effectively.
accuracy
Review your essay for spelling, punctuation, and word choice errors. Correct these issues to enhance the clarity and readability of your essay.
conclusion
Though your conclusion summarizes your essay, try to succinctly restate your opinion and the reasons behind it, avoiding new information or simply repeating what was already said.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural heritage
  • critical thinking
  • historical analysis
  • contemporary challenges
  • economic growth
  • medical advancements
  • technological literacy
  • interdisciplinary
  • well-rounded education
  • intangible insights
What to do next:
Look at other essays: